Learning to interact professionally with different communication styles is something that everyone has to do once they become a real adult with a more demanding job or in general situations that require a bit more delicacy than normal. It’s difficult though, learning how to properly communicate your point to another person in a way that you both can understand is a daunting task if you have difficulties getting along with each other in the first place.
Sometimes this disparity in communication styles can be used to your advantage though!
Personally speaking, I appreciate a more gentle approach to discussing things with different people. I unintentionally soften my words and make it a point to avoid hurting feelings as much as feasibly possible. This does result in issues, though, as my constant softening of words and the tone I take can seem dishonest and condescending to people who appreciate a more blunt approach. Whereas people who appreciate a more blunt approach can seem cruel to me if they word their criticisms or opinions in a way that is grating.
Despite the trouble that this may cause, it can also be used to your advantage.
Practicing conversation with people who communicate differently than yourself is absolutely crucial, and I find that the more people I talk to in a professional setting that prefer to speak in different ways than me, the more adept I become at navigating conversations in general.
Instead of tip-toeing around certain topics, I try to match the energy of the person I’m talking with, and this removes some of the reservations I have when it comes to everyday situations. If someone is blunt, I respond bluntly. If someone prefers my more gentle tone, I let myself talk in a less restrained way. It leads to an easier style of conversation, and even if adapting to different communication styles can be tiring, it’s rewarding when it feels like the talk has been ended at a good point.
This method also works for friendships! Up until this point, I’ve had friends that take a more relaxed approach to friendship (or, to some people, a more lazy approach). Some people I’ve recently met though have a more “strict” mindset where they set out boundaries and allow me the space to set my own as well. This was entirely new to me, and at first, the blunt discussions about something as natural as friendship was startling to me, but it allowed for us to be more comfortable as we know where we stand when it comes to the other person.
This style wouldn’t work with everyone though. I’m sure if I used the same method on some other friends, they would be displeased. It’s all a matter of adapting to the way other people’s minds work. Sure, it’s possible to dig your heels in and refuse to adapt to the way that best works for the other person, but honestly, I find the different perspectives refreshing!
However, it does take a while to get used to this change. I know that some people would consider it “fake” to act differently around other people, but I genuinely think that becoming used to other communication styles and adapting to the way others see the world is a tool that can make discussions—be it in a professional or personal context—far easier than they would be otherwise.