A long relationship is like a knife, after a while, it becomes dull! After the first year of being in a monogamous relationship, the butterflies that you once had may begin to fade away. You don’t laugh at his jokes anymore; he doesn’t compliment your eyes like he used to… what went wrong? Yes, the two of you may have fallen in love with each other; however, love is something that needs constant attention. If the two of you stop doing what you once did at the start of the relationship, then you can count on your relationship to head downhill. Here are five tips on how to keep the spark alive.
- Communication: Lack of communication is one of the top reasons why long-term relationships call the quits. If he doesn’t know your problems and concerns, it is impossible for him to fix them (this goes both ways). Neither of you are mind readers. Trust and communication come hand and hand. If you two are really in love, you should be able to tell each other anything. Lack of communication can also cause great confusion and wrong assumptions. Communicating isn’t rocket science, just keep each other posted.
- Stay Hot!: The two of you obviously hooked up for a reason…and let’s face it, the initial reason was probably not an awesome personality. Of course he loves you for your personality, but at first, he just thought you were sexy! In order to keep that attraction alive, you must stay sexy! After a while, some couples may let their appearance go because they get too comfortable… unattractively comfortable. That is a huge no-no. One thing you must remember, there are other beautiful girls in the world; you’re not the only one. Therefore, you must always grab his attention; keep his eyes on you! Dress like you did when you wanted to impress him on your first date. Randomly wear sexy lingerie to bed one night. This will make him “fall in love at first sight” with you all over again.
- Be Spontaneous: For months, the two of you have been doing a dinner and a movie as your “date night”. Although it might be enjoyable, it can get redundant really quick. Do something different for a change. Take a road trip somewhere just to go sightseeing. Go to a restaurant where a band is playing. Do a “quickie” in an abandoned house…okay that might be a little too spontaneous. Don’t let your relationship get old, be creative!
- Hang out Separately: If you guys plan on being with each other for a long time, there is no need to be joined at the hip. The two of you need space, especially if you live together. If the two of you are always together, you will get tired of each other! Or even worse, the two of you will become dependent on each other; that is extremely unhealthy. Let him hang out with the boys on the weekend while you have a girl’s night. Make him miss you! They do say absence makes the heart grow stronger. Also, this will show your friends that you’re not neglecting them.
- Learn to Sacrifice: As the days go by in your relationship, it’s inevitable that the issues that come along with your relationship will become more serious. All the kiddie problems should be out the window at this point. Now, the two of you have to focus on the future. For example, he might have a job offer in California, while you have a job offer in New York (that may be extreme, but it’s something to think about). If you have any in hope in your relationship’s destiny, then you must be willing to compromise your future with his. If he is willing to do the same for you, then that is how you’ll know your relationship is worth being rekindled. To know that someone will sacrifice something for you brings love to a whole other level. That is the ultimate way to keep the spark alive.
Relationships are hard. Every day, couples have to face issues with temptation, money, and compromise. There’s no doubt that it can be extremely stressful. That is why it is important that you pay attention to the little things. It is the little things that will give you two the drive to push through any issues that you may come across. Keep the spark alive, your future depends on it!