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Figuring Him Out: Does He Just Want to Hit the Sheets?

For many collegiettes, free time in college consists of meeting new people–including potential partners. Dating is a reality for many of us. However, figuring out if a guy likes you or not can be a confusing task. One common mistake girls make is falling for guys who act as if they like you, but in reality, only want sex. The most annoying part is that most guys won’t admit that they’re talking to a girl just to sleep with her. They will make all the right moves and say all the right things, but in the end, only want a physical relationship. This is where I come in. I asked a few guys on campus and did a bit of research to help collegiettes figure out if the guy they’re talking to wants an emotional relationship, or only wants to hit the sheets. 

Getting to know a new guy and dating is fun. It can be intriguing, funny, it can be memorable and exciting, but what about when feelings get involved? You know that point where you conclude, “Hey, I like this guy but does he like me, or is he just trying to get something? Am I one of the bros–where does he see us going?” Understanding a man can be difficult, decipering those mixed signals can be confusing and figuring out whether he really likes you can be outright stressful. So, sometimes us girls need advice from other girls who’ve been through it, the male sex himself and even professionals!

It is somewhat easier than it seems; there are basic red flags that girls should be able to identify right away. For instance, if he only texts you to chill at his or your dorm or house and never takes you out, that’s a sign he just wants to get with you intimately, according to James William and Jocelyn Moore, students at VCU. James also said if he texts you during “booty call hours”, that’s exactly what he wants. Booty call hours are anything after 10:30 p.m. and before 5:00 a.m. However, if he makes time or even clears his schedule to spend time with you when he’s made it clear that he’s busy, you’re clearly a priority or he’s trying to make you a priority so there’s a good chance he’s interested in you, according to Anthony White.

How a guy compliments you can also be a hint about how he feels that might not be immediately apparent! Does he comment on your body a lot? Or does he pay attention to smaller things like the color of your eyes or the way your hair smells? These are signs you can use to decide whether or not you even want to date him. On a more positive note, a sign he does like you is if he sends you “good morning/good night” texts, says Iman Nur, VCU student.

After you start getting to know one other and you go out to eat a few times, or go the movies, you may still have doubts–it’s natural. Ask yourself a few questions, according to LuvEmorLEaveEm.com. First, does he ask “get to know you” questions? Is he really interested in getting to know you? Does he ask about hobbies, hidden talents, even funny childhood stories? Second, does he give you “get to know you” information? This will tell you if he wants you to know him on a personal level or if he wants no information given because he just wants to hook up. And last, and probably the biggest for many men and women, have you met his friends? Being introduced to a potential boyfriend’s bros is a big deal. He’s showing them that you’re his, you’re off limits and he really likes you. So chances are, if he hasn’t told his friends about you, and hasn’t introduced you to them, it’s because he doesn’t want anybody to know you exist. Bottom line, you’re not that important–it’s not because he wants you all to himself! Don’t be naïve!

While there’s nothing wrong with pursuing a more physical than emotional relationship if that’s what you’re seeking, make sure you read your situation correctly so you don’t fall for someone who is only yours after dark.


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