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11 Signs You Might Be the Helpless Child of Your Friend Group

If you find yourself calling up your friends at 12 a.m. crying because you can’t find your shoes and forgot to eat something (other than cold pizza and coffee), you might be the helpless child of your friend group. 
 

1. You’re constantly texting them asking how to do hard things.

“How long are you supposed to cook spaghetti for?””HELP! How do you change a tire?!?!?!””Can you proofread this text before I send it….”

 

2. You have most of their closet because you’re always borrowing their clothes.

 

Remember that time you showed up and forgot that the event was formal attire? Good thing your friend had an extra dress. It was also very nice of them to let you borrow something clean/unstained for that big job interview! You also may have a couple of their sweaters from those times you forgot…

 

3. They usually give you a 10 minute grace period before worrying about where you are when you don’t show up.

Since, you know, you’re always late.
 
4. You have never been the DD.‘Nuf said. Too much responsibility, and you’re enough of a handful as it is.
 
5. They know your favorite pizza toppings, preferred Starbucks order, and what to bring when you’ve had a bad day.
It’s not easy being a helpless child, but you’re lucky to have friends who know what delicious, fattening, sugary snacks and coffee to bring you when life is just too much.
 
6. They absolutely understand how important naptime is for you and will not disturb you.

In fact, they don’t even judge you for “resting your eyes” at random times and places, nor will they judge you for drinking your 5th cup of coffee that day.

7. Someone has had to come pick you up as a result of poor planning on your part.

“I know that my gas tank was running on empty, but I just thought I had more time!”

8. They may or may not have scolded you for irresponsible purchases.

What am I gonna do with 20 bath bombs if I don’t even have money for rent? Smell fantastic, that’s what.

9. You always get advice, whether it’s asked for or not.

Yeah, yeah. I get it. ‘Don’t stay up late watching Buzzfeed videos on a school night’. ‘Don’t run off to play Flipcup with strangers’. ‘Text me when you get home’, bla bla bla… Yeah I remember what happened last time… I got it. Thanks.

10. In fact, it might just be easiest to keep you on a leash when you all go out.

Have you ever heard your friends argue over who’s “turn” it was to “watch” you? What can you say? You’re just a little ball of energy sometimes.

11. At the end of the day, you know your parents friends are there for you no matter what.

Even when they embarrass you in public with their friendly affection.

Katie is a 21 year old Psychology major at Virginia Commonwealth University. Her legal name is Katherine, but only her mother can call her that when she's in trouble. She loves coffee, lipstick, science, leggings, and people who properly cite their sources.
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