My best friend Fran can listen to any song and play it perfectly on the guitar immediately after. My oldest sister, Gabby builds mashups for her acapella group like Becca from Pitch Perfect. I, on the other hand, literally couldn’t tell you what comes after “do re me”, the longest playlist on my Spotify is 6 hours and 15 minutes of Disney original music, and if at any given time you took out my Airpods and stuck them in your own ears you’d be listening to an adolescent audiobook. Usually speakers and writers like to establish their credibility on a topic before continuing so the audience knows that they can trust them. You simply should not trust my taste in music.
However, I believe you can trust me in different ways. I might not know music but I do know heartbreak, and for most people, the quieter you handle a break up the better. Unless you’re Olivia freaking Rodrigo.
#1: drivers license (Obviously)
While I usually find the absence of capitalization in messages a sure sign of a pick me girl (derogatory), I will make an exception for Olivia Rodrigo, drivers license, and the rest of the Sour album because she has reinvented my perception of a pick me girl. “Pick me” is the realist way to express heartbreak, and Meredith Grey from Grey’s Anatomy can attest to that.
“Pick me, choose me, love me.”
When someone decides that their life would ultimately be better without us in it, we guilt them into feeling bad about it. Olivia made sure we all hated her fellow singer song-writer ex boyfriend, Joshua Bassett, and even though that might be mean, it’s real.
Even me, a die hard Ricky Bowen fan (Don’t act surprised, you know how long my Disney playlist is), turned my back on Joshua Bassett after the release of this song. I remember going through a break up and wishing desperately that our mutual friends would take my side. That they would recognize him as the villain and leave him just as I was forced to.
What I admire most about this song is Olivia’s willingness to expose herself on our behalf. She paints herself as the fool because we have all been foolish before, and isn’t it nice to know you’re not the only one? Wanting to drive down your ex’s street, being pissed off that they promised you forever and then took it back, annoying your friends because you talk about your ex so much…Dearest Olivia, we thank you for your candor and your relatability.
#2: good 4 u
If you look up the Sour album on Spotify you’ll notice that good 4 u (1,669,073,816) has more streams than drivers license (1,640,093,525). When I first noticed that I was absolutely flabbergasted. There is no doubt in my mind that drivers license had more social media attention than good 4 u, which leads me to the one and only reason that good 4 u makes this list – what I believe to be the reason that its streams are suspiciously high. Whether Olivia intended to make a frat anthem is beyond my knowledge, but sure enough, she did.
As someone who doesn’t know music very well I am shamefully ignorant to the lyrics of the popular frat party songs. However, best believe I am screaming good 4 u at the top of my lungs every. damn. time.
And I know I said that this song makes my list for only one reason, but there is something about the fact that Olivia is literally committing arson in her music video that really does it for me.
#3: traitor
Just two weeks after the infamous Olivia/Joshua break up, Josh started dating another singer songwriter, Sabrina Carpenter. According to Olivia, they were talking even while she and Josh were in a relationship. He had told her she was paranoid for suspecting more than platonic feelings between them, and then flaunted their new relationship in her face.
“Brown guilty eyes and little white lies.”
I can’t say that I’m a jealous person when I’m dating somebody. Nearly all of my current boyfriend’s friends are women, and it couldn’t bother me less. Actually, I’ve kissed more of them than he has. However, I understand that that’s a rare feeling, and regardless I still find traitor painfully relatable.
“Guess you didn’t cheat, but you’re still a traitor.”
The idea that the person you love more than anyone might love someone else is quite possibly the most sickening feeling ever. Why else would people be motivated to get with their ex’s best friends…the “hurt them before they hurt you” mentality runs far too deep for gen z. But, the people in our lives can have that kind of power over us – the power to destroy us when they are no longer around, the power to make us fear losing them, and the power to make us feel betrayed when they choose to stop caring. Olivia Rodrigo puts pain into lyrics. This song so accurately delineates messy love.
#4: Skin by Sabrina Carpenter
As far as I’m concerned this is the greatest clapback in media history. Olivia Rodrigo said, “she’s everything I’m insecure about” suggesting that Sabrina is basically perfect and Sabrina said, I know, and I’m screwing your boyfriend too.
“You can try to get under my, under my, under my skin while he’s on mine.”
There are about a million subtweets to Olivia in this song yet Sabrina claimed “The song isn’t calling out one single person.” Sure enough, I, along with the rest of the world, was baffled that 22-year-old Sabrina was writing a diss track about 18-year-old Olivia for giving her a compliment. The drama was simply too intense for me to NOT include it in this list.
I have personally never been the other woman, nor suspicious that a boyfriend of mine was emotionally cheating on me, but there is something notable about Sabrina’s message. Eleanor Roosevelt said, “No one can hurt you without your consent,” and Sabrina reminded us of that. Even amongst my past hatred for her, I respected it.
#5: Set Me Free by Joshua Bassett
While Sabrina might have gathered the strength to stand up to Olivia and her ferocious fans, Joshua was not so lucky. He suffered stress-induced heart failure soon after the release of Olivia’s drivers license. The doctors told him he had a 30% chance of survival. Almost a year later, Josh released Set Me Free, along with two other songs, and I’ve never felt like such a terrible person.
On the surface, this song is about how Sour destroyed Josh. He received thousands of death threats after the release of drivers license. Olivia’s words charmed us into hating him for a crime as legal as breaking another’s heart, yet we turned on him like he had committed murder. We were the real killers.
“Why must I hurt for you to feel okay?”
I know far too many people, along with myself, who secretly hoped in the darkest parts of their minds that their exes would hurt the way they did. I’m not sure I fully understood just how toxic and immature that is until listening to Set Me Free. I hated this song at first because it was a mirror, and what I saw in the reflection was someone ugly on the inside. Tearing down someone you used to love does not cure sadness. Hot girls take the high road.
I guess I love Olivia Rodrigo and Joshua Basset’s music for different reasons. Olivia makes me feel understood, but Joshua makes me a better person.
#6: Let You Go by Joshua Bassett in Disney’s High School Musical The Musical The Series
Okay, here me out. I know choosing a song from a tween TV show is a bold move, but I think we need to appreciate the fact that while this break up was going on, Olivia and Joshua were actively playing a TV couple (And I’d be lying if I told you that I don’t still root for their characters to get back together…and lowkey them in real li- I’ll stop.)
At this point, the music produced by this famous ex-couple had the sole goal of tearing each other down. At first we thought Josh was the villain, and then we realized that Olivia was just as heartless. While Let You Go was written for Joshua’s character Ricky Bowen, on the show High School Musical the Musical the Series, it is the first song which shows an optimistic side to breaking up, and that is what earns its place on this list.
There is so much emotion in this song. Defeated, Josh wants more than anything to preserve the good parts of his previous relationship. Part of what makes Let You Go so beautiful is how he reminisces while also making peace with the end. It’s so hard to find the demarcation between reminiscing and ruminating during a break up, but Josh hits the nail right on the head.
“I’ll always be in love with who we used to be. I’ll save the photographs and keep the memories.”
Sometimes it’s important to remember that you used to love your ex. They used to be your person. And just because you are no longer together does not mean you have to hate them or the old relationship. Appreciate the old magic, but store it safely in a box in the back of your closet.
#7: because i liked a boy
Let me just start by saying that Olivia was onto something when she said that Sabrina is everything that she’s insecure about, because same. Goddamn that is a beautiful woman.
The setting for because i liked a boy’s music video was a circus, symbolizing the innocence of having a crush, yet the reality that Sabrina became a spectacle, the subject of other people’s gossip, and a clown for believing that the internet would be forgiving. While Skin suggested that Sabrina didn’t care if we hated her, because I liked a boy demonstrated that we had no right to hate her in the first place.
“Now I’m a homewrecker, I’m a slut. I got death threats filling up semi trucks.”
“I’m a rebound gettin’ round stealin’ from the young.”
Maybe there is some maturity that comes with being the eldest in this love triangle, but once again Sabrina taught us a lesson. Your words have power. Careful what you say and careful what you believe. Those are other people’s lives.
After everything we as an audience have put Sabrina Carpenter through, I really hope the best for her, but I hope the best doesn’t look like Dylan O’Brien like the rumors suggest because he’s been my celebrity crush since Teen Wolf came out in 2011 and I’m still not ready to share him.
#8: i’m sorry
Not Joshua literally taking responsibility for ALL OF IT.
“I know that I’m to blame, so go ahead and blame it on me.”
I can imagine the little fist pump that Olivia did after listening to this song for the first time. Who doesn’t secretly dream of their ex apologizing so they no longer have to carry any of the burden. Maybe part of what makes this song good is that Josh said what so many people want to hear.
And while I’m not sure that it really was all Joshua’s fault, I do admire this song. He admits to not being proud of who he was, a relatable concept, and the parallel to Olivia Rodrigo’s driver license in the way he exposes himself is shocking. However, we all make mistakes in relationships and we all make mistakes in breakups. No one is perfect. I’m glad this song normalizes that.
“It’s cliche but it’s true.”
Admitting and recognizing our faults is important to having healthier relationships in the future. I think i’m sorry might romanticize that part of a break up, but it’s still a good sentiment to share. And the end of the song, where Josh wishes Olivia the best, is poetic in its own way too. No matter who is meant to date who, we are all meant to be happy.
Also, PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD CAN WE START USING CAPITALIZATION IN OUR TITLES.
#9: would you love me now?
When I heard this song for the first time I immediately texted my best friend demanding that he listen so we could deliberate. There is so much to unpack.
It is exactly what you think. A song worth dropping your jaw to the floor – Joshua Bassett wondering if Olivia Rodrigo would love him again after everything they put each other through.
“If I showed up at your doorstep would you turn me away? Or would you care to see a stranger whose eyes are still the same?”
I couldn’t have asked for a better song to close this list with. See, normally I think the notion of getting back together with an ex is horribly toxic. Take it from someone guilty of that crime. Rarely does getting back together resolve the issues that led to the initial break up, and in my case it just made distrust grow exponentially.
However, listen to the song. I promise you’ll forget your doubts just as I did. The beat, the piano, Joshua’s voice. It could melt even in the coldest snowman. The song is eager, optimistic, and hopeful. Every part of me had chills after listening.
And, if you can look past the fact that he’s inquiring about someone whose music LITERALLY almost killed him, the vibe of the song reminds me a lot of what it feels like to fall in love again after a painful break up.
“I’m running out of reasons not to do it all again.”
Josh was as low as a person can get and yet was still willing to risk falling in love for a second time. After everything he had endured, one person was worth the danger. I can relate to this feeling. The Olivia, Joshua, and Sabrina drama comes full circle, showing all cycles of love and loss.
—
At the end of the day break ups are painful. I imagine having your personal life on blast to the whole world as you go through heartbreak makes it infinitely worse. I sympathize with Olivia, Joshua, and Sabrina, I really do. But…I will say this. Those three walked out of a universal experience with a disgusting amount of money and publicity. One could argue (and one is arguing) that this love triangle was the best thing that ever happened to any of their careers. All I’m trying to say is that, I might have been more accepting of the pain I went through after my first break up if I, too, got three Grammys and millions of dollars. I guess we can’t all be so lucky.
In all seriousness, I’m glad they have all recovered and moved on from the drama, and I’m grateful for the music that came out of it.