TW: Suicide, Self Harm, Sexual Asult, Abuse
September is Suicide Awareness Month. I am using my newfound platform to share my story in hopes of helping someone else who also faces the hardest decision of their life. I as always will be completely honest so read forward with caution as this content isn’t for everyone. However feel free to scroll to the bottom to read how I overcame it and what you can do to help yourself. As always my beautiful reader remember you matter, you are loved, and you are stronger than you think.
The first decision came at 16, I was at a new low and felt as if I was alone and no one understood what I was going through. I had been sexually assaulted by a family member weeks prior and while I never told anyone I opened up to a friend that I was no longer ‘pure’. She told my parents, their reaction was what it usually was; to yell and punish. To this day no one knows the true story. They yelled and blamed me, threw out my ‘slutty’ clothes (anything that showed the freckle on my collarbone) and made me drop out of high school. For hours one adult after another came back to room and lectured me on how I needed to save my body, as my eyes were screaming please see me, please understand. I can not say it but please see me for who I am and not this action. They didn’t.