This new school year has overwhelmed me. So, that means things have to change. I felt the need to make an energy shift, so it made me think about creating boundaries in my life. The difference between a wall and a boundary is almost too hard to tell the difference between. Often, especially in our age group, we too often don’t understand the difference between the two and end of doing one of two things: Missing out on opportunities or getting taken advantage of.
I’m here to shed some light on the two and amplify their differences.
A wall is concrete. It doesn’t allow room for holes or transparency. These are beneficial for many things that could truly be detrimental to your growth such as drug abuse, alcohol abuse, mental health triggers, etc. Those are things you shouldn’t compromise on and keep stringent and inflexible rules in your life if you’ve struggled with them in the past.
However, many attempt to use “walls” as an interchangeable word with “boundaries.” Boundaries differ in ways that can offer more flexible terms that could prove to work in your favor. If every friendship you’ve had for the past year has failed, you probably feel like you should NOT have friends. That’s a common wall to build, but instead of cutting potential friends out of your life in complete, build a boundary that will enable you to focus on the characteristics you don’t want in a friend and identify those in people coming your way. That allows you to make new friends, but BETTER friends. A great friend told me once, “I don’t work on weekends.” That is her boundary with any jobs she chooses to work, and she stands firm in her sentiments. Doesn’t mean she isn’t fit to work, it just means she has her limits she won’t move on. Healthy boundaries like that can empower you to have a choice in what you will handle and tolerate in your life. Whereas a wall will take something if not many things away from your life. I don’t recommend not utilizing walls, however, I think it is valuable to use both, but know how they differ to aid you!
So, think about this season in your life. Do you need a wall or a boundary? Maybe even leave a comment and let me know how you feel!
Have a great week, friends! HCXO