15 Animals to Match Your Drunk Moods

  1. 1. Moving Around the Zoo

    Jessica told you to meet up here at nine before it gets busy but judging from the dudes you just had to plow through, this place is going to get wild. It’s a good think you’re ready to accept the call!

  2. 2. I’d Rather Eat Grass for Entertainment

    You found Jessica and the gang, but they got a head start and have already started the weekly rant session. Emily got a bad grade, Sara has a parking ticket, Jackie’s roommate is driving her up the wall, Tonya has a bad lab partner, and you just want to start drinking.

  3. 3. Dancing Queen

    ABBA is going to be so proud! Look at you go on just a few shots of bourbon. You can twerk, jive, dab, twirl, and floss. You really should call a talent agent next time.

  4. 4. Curious Georgie

    Your lipstick feels sticky. Did you put it on right? Is it always this sticky or are you just hyperaware of the stickiness when drinking?

  5. 5. Majestic AF

    The night is young and so are you. Nobody has ever been this gorgeous before. A master Renaissance artist must have sculpted you from clay and miracles.

  6. 6. Very Drunk

    You’re burning up, and not just on the dance floor. It’s kind of floaty and numb, but you’re super cool and can roll with it. You’ve got so much night left to live girl!

  7. 7. Friends R Us!

    That girl over there ordering has a really cute jacket. The bartender has adorable earrings. And you’re surrounded by a dozen other women with beautiful smiles and other awesome accessories. You should all be friends and start a band!

  8. 8. The World is a Labyrinth

    The bar has become way more crowded and noisy. You’ve found yourself in a desolate place separated from your girl gang. You’ve got to keep going so you are aren’t knocked over, but you don’t really know where to go but forward. Just keep swimming girl!

  9. 9. Worrying is Everything

    Are you ever going to find your friends again? Can Emily do extra credit? Is Sara going to learn not to park in the red zone? Can Jackie get out of her lease? Will Tonya be able to switch partners? Is there more alcohol behind the bar? So many unanswered questions! What fear!

  10. 10. Is This Over Yet?

    They’ve played that Kanye song three times now. That has to be the last call of the 21st century. It’s still super catchy, but it can’t distract you anymore from the girl throwing up in the bathroom, the drinks spilled on your shoes, and the guy that keeps yelling about getting shots. It’s about that time. Does the bar have tacos to go?

  11. 11. Kangaroo Jacked to Get Out of Here

    Jamie came through with designated driving, and you’re getting packed up and ready to embark on a journey to the Holy Grail that is Taco Bell. But Emily needs to get her jacket, Sara’s in the line to the bathroom, Jackie has to finish her drink, and Tonya is on the phone with her ex. It’ll take some time, but you’ll get those tacos!

  12. 12. Closed? Noooooo!

    You came all the way here, but all you have is a locked door. Are the tacos okay? Who would hurt those precious creations? And what are you going to eat now to beat the hangover? What is this cruel world?

  13. 13. Eating Like A Beast

    It might not be tacos, but McDonald’s is Heaven on Earth for your drunk state. $20 for nearly endless nuggets? Yes Please! Get all the fries you can eat girl because everyone knows drunk calories don’t count. You can totally slay those tacos next time.

  14. 14. Life is Cozy

    You’re dropped off, your night routine is as done as possible and you are well on your way to catching those z’s. What a night…or day now.

  15. 15. What Day is It?

    It can’t be today already! There was supposed to be more time. You were supposed to plan and be prepared for this work, but now you’re left to your devices while drunk at 2am. It won’t be easy, and it probably won’t be fun, but you’re truly in for the satisfaction of a lifetime when you finish just before class starts. You go girl!

Every night out might not be perfect, but they’re always wild with your crew. Be a party animal to your heart’s content!