Her Campus Logo Her Campus Logo
placeholder article
placeholder article

Do I Need to Attend Your Wedding?

This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Utah chapter.

Even if you live in your home state, sometimes you aren’t going to have the time–or desire–to go to a wedding on the weekend when you could be snuggled up in bed with Netflix. But now the time comes, after you have opened the envelope with yet another invitation, that you ask yourself: do I NEED to go to your wedding? This isn’t about whether you have the time to go, the money for a gift, or even if you want to attend. This is about if going is low-key required of you.

Do I need to fly?

When a wedding requires a flight then, as a college student, you aren’t obligated to attend the wedding. This shouldn’t be expected of a college student who has classes, a job, and extra circulars. As always some cases will have exceptions, if you have been asked to be a bridesmaid then you should probably attend or if it’s like, your mom’s wedding…probably should show to that. But if it’s someone you’re not super close with and you will end up missing school or work, you need to prioritize what you can realistically miss in order to be there. 

Am I a bridesmaid?

If you were asked to be in the bridal party then you should definitely go. If you are that close to them, not only should you be excited to go, but you should also ask your friends that are also going if they want to pitch for a gift. And, even if you’re not close with them, they are close to you. Otherwise they wouldn’t have invited you to be in their photo albums for all of eternity. This will allow you to get a gift the bride and groom not only need but what they want. 

Is it a family member?

If the bride or groom is your cousin and the wedding is less than 5 hours away, you should go. Seeing your family may not seem to be the most fun activity in the world for some people but you do get to brag about all of your accomplishments and fun times you’re having in college. Also, don’t ever forget, you get cake.

Will you be in my life in a few years?

If you don’t even like their Instagram pics on a regular basis, then it isn’t necessary to attend. It really depends on your past and your future. If you were once best friends, even if you no longer talk, you should consider attending or getting a small gift. However, if it has been a while and you know you will not be making an effort to reconnect in the future then there isn’t a need to be at their wedding.

So next time you are staring at that RSVP card, don’t feel stressed because you don’t need to go to every wedding you are invited to. And if you are still struggling with making a decision, think about it like this: would you be excited to see them at your wedding? 

If I'm not cooking or in school I am usually binge watching Friends, Arrow, or Harry Potter. I am a Slytherin and an Alpha Phi. I believe that mermaids can exist and I would like to be the first one. I sleep with a dragon at my side named Toothless every night. If I could get paid to travel the world I would never stay in the same place longer than a month.
Her Campus Utah Chapter Contributor