Up until I turned 19 I felt like I was living the life of another person. A robotic, underwhelming way of living. I wanted to do, say, or wear things outside of the norm. The only facet of my life that I can truly say wasn’t based around the interests and likes of my peers was my taste in music and movies. I’ve always been the type of person who never followed music or movie trends. Literally everything else was this fabricated copy of what I thought people would like, what I hoped people would accept. But how can you crave acceptance when you don’t even know yourself first?
There were so many things I wanted to say and do but I couldn’t because I lacked the strength, the confidence. It wasn’t cool to be different and any person who didn’t follow the masses surely was going to be subject to bullying. So I unhappily followed the masses, yearning for the day when I could finally be who I wanted to be. Unapologetically myself.
It wasn’t until I was 19 years old that I began to explore things outside of my comfort zone. I began to challenge societal norms and with that came a new sense of comfort. I was comfortable in every sense of the world. I started wearing and saying what I wanted. Hell, if I wanted to have fire engine bright red hair I did. If I wanted to wear men’s clothing and be outspoken about topics and issues that were typically deemed “taboo” I would. I began to develop this “Who gives a sh*t” attitude because for so long I was chained down by the opinions of others. Now at 21 I simply, truly and wholeheartedly do not care.
The road to self-love wasn’t easy, and I can honestly say it was a hard one. But my decision to buckle down and realize that I’m the only person who can ever hurt my feelings or block my own blessings drove me to want to be better and now I couldn’t be happier.
So if you’re struggling right now, speak your truth in the air. Let the universe hear your positive self-affirmations and watch them carry over tenfold. Take a look in the mirror every day and talk to yourself. Compliment yourself but remember to be gentle. Be kind to your mind and body. Be yourself and know that that is good enough. I promise you all, loving yourself is rewarding not only mentally, but physically as well and once you start it’ll be hard to stop. Once you get it in your head that nobody can tell you anything about yourself that you haven’t already acknowledged or understood you’ll be unstoppable!