Rape culture is a sociological term coined by second-wave feminists during the 1970s to describe the prevalence and normalization of rape and sexual violence in society. This social manifestation is perpetrated through:
- misogynistic language
- victim-blaming
- sexual objectification of the female body
- a refusal to understand the damages rape causes
- slut-shaming
- the constant denial of someone else’s rape
- the glamorization of sexual violence in the media and popular culture
Some people are intimidated by the term “rape culture” for two reasons: 1) they believe that the term was created by “feminazis,” who wanted to overexaggerate the sexual violence that’s always existed against women as an attempt to antagonize all men; and 2) they consciously don’t want to believe that something as violent, repulsive, and dehumanizing as rape could ever form part of their culture. Culture is supposed to celebrate the progress of a society through its achievements, customs, arts, traditions and social institutions. It’s not supposed to hold something as rape within it like it’s just another tradition. However, rape has become part of every single culture in the world. This only demonstrates how serious and prevalent rape is because it exists within all societies.
Rape culture is mostly associated with an injustice that only happens to women. Unlike men, women live with the constant fear of someday being raped. This is not to say that men can’t or don’t fear being raped, but in general, they don’t carry the burden of even thinking about it. Furthermore, according to statistics, women are more likely to get raped. Men don’t have to watch out for what they’re drinking in case it gets roofied. Men don’t have to feel self-conscious about what they wear, in case some pervert out there finds it “revealing enough” to make sexual advances. Men don’t have to watch their surroundings in search of any creep who threatens their safe space. Men don’t have to measure what they say around other men. Men don’t have to modify the way they look as a defense mechanism against rapists. Men don’t have to limit their behavior in fear of rape. Men don’t have to think about rape as much as women do because it has become a crime that’s mostly targeted at women.
These drastic actions that compose the “don’t” in men’s realities are what revolves around women’s world. It’s a daily dilemma, a mantra of some sort, and it’s exhausting. This collective fear is no coincidence or exaggeration. It comes from a place of power, where the female population is still subjected to the male one. This doesn’t mean that all men are rapists or that all women are victims of rape. It simply describes a cycle of terror that is planted in women’s minds since they’re too young to comprehend the danger of existing, and it all stems from centuries of patriarchal domination. In this sense, rape culture can be described as a toxic tradition that is passed from generation to generation, like some sort of patrimony.
It’s scary to think that some people prefer to blame the victim because it’s easier than confronting the horrific truth. Confronting the truth leads to two things: 1) the realization that some “caring and loving” man with “a bright future ahead of him” could do something so vile and heinous; and 2) the fact that they have to do something about it, whether it’s supporting the victim or spreading the word about the danger the victim’s rapist poses. Since the truth is built upon comprehension, empathy and action, it becomes easier to believe a lie that’s dressed as the truth. In this case, a lie has layers to it that are unknown by its believers. Statements like “We had sex, but she wanted it” and “She’s trying to ruin my reputation” seem to be enough for the people who don’t want any disturbance in their community. Why do these people easily believe a rapist when he denies the assault, but search for any explanation to blame the victim? They allow the rapist to provide his side of things, but absolutely loathe the victim when she decides to do the same thing, thus leading to the feared victim shaming.
“She provoked him!”
“What was she wearing?”
“Was she drunk?”
“Why was she out so late?”
“What did she expect?”
“She probably wanted it.”
“Why didn’t she say no?”
“Boys will be boys.”
These are the voices of society, from social media to the world.
There are other cases where, despite the abundance of evidence, the victim doesn’t get justice. This is the case for Chanel Miller. She was raped while unconscious behind a Stanford University campus dumpster. Her rapist, Brock Turner, was discovered committing the crime by two graduate students who were cycling around campus at 1:00 a.m. Both men held Turner into place until the police arrived. Despite the two eyewitnesses and the incriminatory evidence against him, Turner was only given six months of prison. To make matters worse, he only served three months of his sentence.
The judge, Aaron Persky, justified the sentencing by saying, “A prison sentence would have a severe impact on him.” A severe impact on him. What about the victim? What about the physical, psychological and emotional damage she’s condemned to suffer because of him? This statement only shows the eerie tolerance society has for rape and the need to sympathize with the rapist.
It’s true that Turner has to register as a sex offender for the rest of his life, but he still has his freedom. With his freedom, he can continue to hurt vulnerable women as he pleases. There’s no sense of justice when this is the outcome. This transmits a harrowing message: a man can rape whoever he wants because there’s hardly ever punishment for his actions. Then, another message: women need to fend for themselves and live with the constant fear of rape. In the case of Turner, rape culture as a toxic tradition that’s passed from generation to generation like some sort of patrimony, is reflected through both him and his father. After the six-month prison sentence was announced, Turner’s father protested by saying, “[The sentence] is a steep price to pay for 20 minutes of action out of his 20 plus years of life.” With just one sentence, his father reduced the brutal assault to simply “20 minutes of action” and demonstrated that rape is, sadly, part of our culture.
Rape culture is mostly associated with an injustice that only happens to women (that much is true), but men are also victims of it. Maybe they don’t have to live with the constant fear or limit their behavior on a daily basis as a mechanism to “prevent” rape, but that doesn’t mean that men don’t get raped. It manifests differently for them. When a person is raped, be it a woman or a man, there’s a physical, psychological and emotional trauma that will stay with them forever. Every time a man speaks up about being raped, he receives mockery from society. People don’t take him seriously.
This has a lot to do with gender. According to societal beliefs, a man is supposed to be strong, sexual, dominant, courageous and superior to a woman. This is why most people don’t believe men when they step forward to tell their stories. It’s preposterous for society and the toxic masculinity that exists within it that a man gets raped. There’s an unspoken norm that states that men can’t get raped. As if their gender determines that they are completely immune to it, which is far from the truth. This is why most men choose to not share their experiences. The fear for them relies on the rejection and mockery from society. After all, what is more emasculating than being exploited in a way that society deems more socially acceptable for women?
If a man gets raped by a woman, society mocks him for two reasons: 1) he’s “stronger” than the woman, so he could’ve easily fought back; and 2) he should want it because that’s all a man wants: sex. These two reasons are not only disgusting and wrong, but they come from a place where gender roles determine what is wrong and right. If a man gets raped by another man, though, it’s a different story. Society mocks him for three very different reasons: 1) if he was raped by a man, that means he’s gay somehow; 2) if he’s gay, it means he wanted it; and 3) it’s “unmanly” to allow that another man rapes another one. As if being raped has something to do with his sexuality. As if being something other than heterosexual was wrong. As if being gay was an invitation to get raped by another man. As if he’s weak because he was raped by another man. Society focuses on men’s sexuality as if it matters if he’s gay or straight or bisexual, instead of focusing on the violent crime committed against him, his body and ultimately, his soul.
Although the term “rape culture” was coined in the 1970s, it has always existed and, sadly, will continue to do so. Society has a scary tolerance for rape and sexual violence because they’ve become accustomed to it. It’s part of our daily lives. The notion of that should be enough to comprehend that there’s something wrong with our approach to it. However, there’s a large population that’s beginning to become intolerant towards it. This is a population that wants justice for the victims, punishment for the rapists and a change in how we, as a society, approach rape.
If we don’t want rape to form part of our culture, the first step is to become conscious about it and the danger it poses. Rape culture is not a myth. Women and men alike are victims of rape and deserve to be believed. Rapists don’t deserve any kind of support. We should all be able to speak up about our experiences. Since this is a cultural and social problem, we, as a society, need to create changes within ourselves. The question is, are you brave enough to use your privilege to stand up for the truth and not tolerate the sexual violence that now forms part of something that defines your community? I know I am. Do you?