Breakups are hard. Whether you were broken up with or did the breaking up, a very important moment in your life has ended and you have to begin anew on your own. With this sharp change comes the overwhelming whirlwind of emotions that can be so hard to navigate. Thankfully, music can be a very powerful tool to cope, whether it be with power anthems and feel-good bops or heart-wrenching and emotional ballads.
Sély’s 5 de Duelo is a masterful work of art that navigates the deep-rooted emotions that claw at you during a breakup. Contrary to feel-good breakup anthems, this EP delves deep into the psyche of the sadness and pain one feels after a relationship ends. It takes the swirling emotions that are so hard to understand and relates them to the five stages of grief. Healing is never linear― it has its ups, downs, and loops, but knowing which stage you are going through at the moment can help you understand how you feel and acknowledge when you’re moving backwards instead of forwards.
Sély will give you the cry you’ve been holding back; she’ll make you think of everything, and I mean everything, and she does it in the most relatable way. I think that’s what makes this EP so beautiful; the raw, intense emotion that automatically draws you in, regardless of your situation.
- Afantasía (Intro)
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The EP starts off with the most emotional intro I’ve ever heard. It shows the very last seconds of a relationship wherein, although this couple clearly cares about each other, they are too caught up in wanting to win an argument that never goes anywhere. It’s chaotic, loud and feels almost intrusive. Then, it invites you into this fantasy: to go through the five stages of grief inside and outside of your head, completely alone. And they’re right, healing is very lonely. You have to learn to live with this person being gone physically while still living vividly in your head. This intro sets the mood for the very rough ride that is the five stages of grief.
- La Mala (Etapa de Negación)
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The most dangerous, and sometimes longest, stage of all is denial. There comes a moment where you just can’t handle being in so much pain anymore. Sély sings about how she’s tired of giving out to undeserving arms more than she ever gave to herself. All the excuses you had convinced yourself of seem worthless now. This person doesn’t get better, they don’t change, the relationship is stuck and you have to be honest and realize there’s no fixing this one.
Somehow you sum up the courage to make the decision to end it once and for all. Sély’s “La Mala” is a shaky sigh of relief, there is no longer the weight of this relationship that seemed to go nowhere, and remembering all the crap you put up with gives you the ultimate “mala” or bad trip. There is disappointment and sadness, but this song also somehow brings a sort of calm. It’s like an odd silence after a massive storm, a break before you begin something completely new and terrifying. If you can get out of the storm alive, what’s next can’t be any worse.
- Diafragma (Etapa de Ira)
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Then comes anger, overwhelming outrage towards this person for leaving, ruining you, loving or not loving you, not trying, and breaking your heart. There’s also anger toward yourself for allowing things to go on far too long, losing yourself, and not seeing what was right there in front of you.
Sély’s “Diafragma” is like a chord being tuned so harshly it snaps. It is a suspended moment where air stands still and the only thing that is certain is emptiness. Now, there is no one to text or call to tell your worries or accomplishments, as the days seem longer and nothing seems certain. This person has taken everything, they’ve taken all your air and hid it in their third lung. They keep it just for the pleasure of taking it from you, and they leave you with nothing. It’s the worst type of anger. It’s calm at first and then you want to cry, yell, and set all their things on fire. The song is bone-chilling, Sély’s lyricism and singing stunningly depicts the harsh and dry anger one feels with so much emptiness that comes from this stage
- Ojalá (Etapa de Negociación)
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After the emptiness has killed you, you’d do anything to feel again. In bargaining, distractions are your best friend. Whether it be work, classes, alcohol, or a replacement, anything to keep you from texting, calling, or looking them up online. You want to distract yourself from everything and just let go.
This stage is full of yearning for love, lust, or happiness, anything to take you away from the sadness of missing them. This song shows the soft but desperate prayer you might whisper to that person. Sély’s enticing singing is heartbreaking yet soothing, lingering in this space between a dream and reality. It’s the longing for the ignorance you had in those rare, blissful moments next to them.
Sély begs for warm comfort, something for all the nights spent alone. It makes you wonder all the could-have-beens, perhaps even makes you doubt the decisions you made that led to the relationship’s end. All you want is to forget all the heartbreak and lay beside that person, erase all the bad, and pretend it never happened. “Ojalá” lingers like a soft touch, and leaves you wanting more.
- Azúcar, Miedo y Canela (Etapa de Tristeza)
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Now you’re sad. All hope is lost, you’re a puddling mess of heartache and nothing seems to get you out of it. You’ve accepted it’s over, completely, and you’ve tried all the remedies but they’ve all run out. There’s nothing left to do but sit and feel the raw emotions you’ve been trying to repress with all the distractions. “Azúcar, Miedo y Canela” has lengthy singing that portrays how time seems to stretch on and on. The end doesn’t seem near at all and you wonder if you’ll ever get better. Sély sings “Me falta ruido”, there’s no sound, there’s no anything. There’s only falling now, as she is left without rhymes, words, or sound, and it’s all thanks to this person. During this stage, your hope is lost and you begin to warm up to the idea that you might never feel okay again.
- Un Minuto de Diciembre (Etapa de Aceptación)
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It doesn’t happen right away, but right when you least expect it, very slowly, you turn to acceptance. Sély starts off saying that she’s tired of being hung up on the past. This is the best description of feeling acceptance, when you finally realize you’re tired of being overwhelmed by only these feelings and nothing more. You want to get out, so you do. You want to give more to yourself rather than to this person. You acknowledge everything that happened to you and that the pain eventually fades. She begins to take a new perspective, a more understanding one. “Un Minuto de Diciembre” brings the best type of calm, where you know everything truly is okay. There is no more hurt, pain, anger, or sadness. There are just the distant memories of who you used to be. There’s no need to long for someone else because all you need now is yourself. And for the first time in so long, that’s okay!
- Iván (Outro)
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The story comes back to the initial couple as Sély sings one last song which acts as a summary of every single feeling and emotion that’s been portrayed in the EP. This outro a delicate melody about how maybe you can acknowledge that there’s a loss but remember that flowers can still bloom from it. The couple continues to talk and they say their last goodbyes, but they’ll leave their arms extended to the possibility of meeting once again. How, once both parts have done their healing on their own, they’ll become better people because of it.
The EP wraps itself up with a perfect, neat bow with stunning production. Sély’s soft and extremely soothing voice, lyricism, and storytelling is brilliantly raw. You won’t resonate with all these emotions the first time you hear it, each listen will be different. Every time I listened to it, I felt drawn to a different song and identified it as the stage I was in. It helped me label what was happening and to even pave somewhat a path towards acceptance. The EP will help you cope with what you’re going through and even help you understand some feelings you don’t know, or may not notice. Although every break up or loss is different, what’s so great about 5 de Duelo is that it portrays such universal feelings. It’s a beautifully cathartic work of art that will leave you with an odd peace of mind. It encourages you to trust in your process and to let yourself feel. Instead of running away from the overwhelmingly scary heartache, Sély delves right into it in the bravest way possible: through art. 5 de Duelo represents art in its truest form.