My freshman year has definitely been an interesting experience ever since deciding to live on campus during a pandemic. I thought I would still make friends despite the fact that everyone would have to social distance and wear masks. My fear of getting Covid-19 mostly stopped me from going out with people and finding new ways to interact. I thought this would be my time to shine in college, but I isolated myself to the point where I am terrified to make new friends in person.
I will not lie. I have made quite a few friends while being on campus mostly from my roommate who already had friends at my university. I have also made a few friends on my own but it is always hard to initiate a time and place to hang out. I am not lonely. I just love spending time with myself and in my own space. I have found out that I just like to be independent and be my own best friend.
During the week, I mostly spend time with myself studying or relaxing. I have really learned how to enjoy my own company and I am very content with that. I get my work done faster when I am by myself . Living in the dorm rooms with another person has made it a little bit harder for me to be by myself all the time, but I try to break out of my room as much as I can to spend some time with me as much as possible.
My form of self love recently has been taking myself on more walks in the fresh air when it is beautiful outside or putting on some of my favorite music and journaling. I also started to push myself to go to different buildings on campus and study to try to spice up the environment around me. I have also been treating myself in between the week to reward myself with how good I am doing with my life so far.
I am trying to push myself more than ever to become more involved in the organizations I am in. While doing this, I can keep myself busy and eventually find more friends who I could hang out with in the future when the pandemic comes to an end. Even though I love being by myself, I would still like to have a group of friends on campus to go to when I want to have a laugh or have fun.
My freshman year so far has taught me that people will come and go during my college career, and that is okay. I have learned that it is time to step up and be my own best friend during these times because nobody can love me the way I can.