I’m here with a simple message: its okay not to know.
Its okay not to know where you’re going or what life is going to throw at you next. College is a crazy time filled with laughter and joy, but also with tears and sorrow. My first semester at UNH was filled with happiness, as I found my place in a community that I loved and was thrilled to be a part of. My second semester, however, was full of frustration and change.
After dealing with significant financial trouble, many phone calls filled with screams, countless meetings with various faculty, and lots of hefty decision making, it was only after receiving withdrawal papers that I realized something very important: A changing path does not mean failure.
Life is fluid. It’s constantly changing, throwing you new challenges, and twisting and turning around until you’re dizzy. The outcome of what your life throws at you does not define who you are, the way you recover from the adversity you are faced with does.
We are resilient, and that is something that ewe never receive the credit for. Regardless of if you are recoiling from the guy who ghosted you on snapchat (who you were absolutely positive that you were going to marry), or deciding whether you can afford to realistically stay in college, you are resilient. We do not let life push us down and take over, we stand up and make the best out of what we have.
There was a large portion of this semester that I wasn’t sure if I would be able to continue. I was fighting with myself each day to complete my assignments, or even to get out of bed. I was giving up since it was becoming more and more each day that I was going to have to leave my beloved university because I simply could not afford to continue here. But then I fell back on what I knew, I leaned on my supports systems and my best friend here, and slowly I began to pick up the pieces of my shattered heart.
I realized that being met with a brick wall did not mean that my life course was permanently disrupted. I know now that I can accomplish my goals regardless of where I am because the drive comes from within me; As long as I want to succeed, I will continue to push myself to do so, and I my path will continue.
To all of you out there who don’t know, regardless of what you’re struggling with, regardless of what you need to figure out, know that you will accomplish was you set out to do, and you find each and every happiness along the way.
“The brick walls are there for a reason. The brick walls are not there to keep us out; the brick walls are there to give us a chance to show how badly we want something. The brick walls are there to stop the people who don’t want it badly enough.” – Randy Pausch