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Serious Relationships in College: Are They Worth It?


As a college student in a serious relationship, I always get asked the question, “Do you think dating in college is worth it?”

I don’t have a clearcut “yes” or “no” answer.  What I do have is a list of pros and cons to help you figure out if being in a serious relationship in college is right for you.

Cons

1. Limiting yourself: The limit literally doesn’t exist in college; it’s endless. Not to mention, there’s an entire world outside of your four years at school. Sometimes, being tied down limits your possibilities.  Let’s be honest: what if there really is someone else out there? It’s difficult to think about, especially if you’re in a relationship, but we’ve all thought it. It’s natural

2. Balancing time: Balancing time spent with friends, time spent with yourself and time spent with your significant other is difficult in college. At one point or another, you’re going to plan a girl’s “wine and rom-com” night the same night your boyfriend wants to take you on a romantic date, and you will have to choose between the two. Dating in college does take away time from your girlfriends, as well as time from yourself. Finding the perfect balance is hard and something to seriously consider before taking the next step to a relationship.

3. Post-grad stress: What happens after graduation? Fear of the unknown plays a big role in relationships. In my opinion, if you can’t see yourself having a legitimate future with said significant other, maybe emotional investment isn’t the best idea.

4. Distractions: Let’s be honest, cuddling up on the couch and binge-watching Netflix with the boy is a loooot more fun than studying for that Chemistry exam. Although college is about exploring and building relationships, schoolwork should also be a priority. Sometimes (the vast majority of the time, tbh), significant others distract us from getting work done.

5. Putting yourself first: Ladies, now is the time to be selfish. Not to sound cliché, but these are some of the best years of your life. You need to take time for yourself; take that semester abroad or that summer internship in another city. BE SELFISH. If being in a serious relationship takes time away from focusing on YOU, then trust me, it’s not worth it.

Pros

1. Security: Do you know what one of the greatest perks of having a boyfriend is? Not having to worry about looking perfect to impress guys at the bar. You know why? Because you’ve already got a man and one who thinks your beautiful at that, sans mascara and eyeliner. Now, I’m not saying women NEED a man to make them happy, because trust me that is absolutely not true. But, it is reassuring to know you have someone waiting at home for you.

2. Regular, safe sex: Does this really need an explanation?

3. An excuse to stay in: Some nights, you just want to curl up under some blankets and watch a good movie. When all your friends are begging you to go out for all-you-can-drink Thursdays at Tin Roof, staying in to relax with your significant other is a great excuse. This way, you still get to have fun, but without any of the drunk girls spilling their fishbowls all over you.

4. Having someone to rely on: It’s nice to know you have someone to do things with, even the most mundane, like running errands at Kroger. Lord knows college can be stressful, but having someone to turn to makes it a lot easier.

5. Responsibility: Dating in college isn’t like dating anywhere else. You have to balance a lot: school, work, social life, etc. The list goes on and on. Not to mention, it’s a new time in your life to go and experience things, and really find who you really are. Having a relationship in college gives you a taste of adult relationships and gives you an overall sense of responsibility.

 

I can’t give you a definite “yes” or “no” as to whether dating in college is worth it or not. Relationships are personal for everyone, and being in one during your time at school is a personal choice that can take a number of various routes: some negative, but others extremely positive.

 

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Jersey girl who loves cats, a good book, and most importantly- the University of Kentucky.
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