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Being an introvert can be extremely overwhelming. You thoroughly love staying home and binge-watching Netflix (or writing Her Campus articles), but there is also the part of you that wishes you could go out and socialize without being exhausted in an hour. This inability to put yourself out there can definitely handicap your social life…including your dating life.
Typically finding a significant other consists of meeting them in your day-to-day life and stepping out of your introvert comfort zone to make it known that you would like to pursue a relationship. Trust me, I know it is not that easy to approach a stranger and start a conversation. Well, maybe it is but it is very terrifying.
Nowadays, there are dozens of online dating websites that can toss out a few of those steps, but also pose their own downsides. As an introvert, I truly enjoy that I can swipe through Tinder and basically find out whatever I would like about these people without actually having to talk to them.
I can look at Jason’s Tinder profile and already know his age, where he works, that he goes to school and get a look at his Spotify playlist. No awkward conversation necessary that involves him telling me that he really does not like dogs and I have to find a way out of that disaster. I am also not left mentally drained (or scarred) after the conversation, since I have been on my couch this whole time. Win-win, right?
However, there is the downfall that follows using dating sites as your main way of finding a prospective partner. There are the people on the dating sites that expect to meet up after five messages have been sent and they do not understand that I rarely show up to events that have been planned for over five days.
My comfort zone, my introvert-ness, does not allow me to do that and despite the connections it may end, it is totally okay. Do not compromise your comfortableness for someone else’s wants.
Also, you never really know who you are talking with online. I do not necessarily mean this in the “you are being cat-fished” way, but anyone can easily pretend to be someone else online.
Jason may seem like a really great guy, and he really enjoys talking about you and your interests. But, when you guys finally meet up he spends the whole time on the phone instead of paying attention to you. This is something you never could have known before meeting him.
I guess that is the positive of meeting a possible significant other in your daily life. You can immediately already know some of what they are like. You may not know where they go to school or work just by looking at them, but you can see how they carry themselves and possibly how they treat those around them.
Approaching someone that you just spotted across the hallway can be extremely intimidating, I know that. But, you are already out and about, so maybe you can push through that extra fifteen minutes of socialization. Take it from another introvert, it could totally be worth leaving the couch.