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This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at UIC chapter.

Love is hard and that is the easiest way to sum it up. There is no guidebook to what you need to do and what is considered right and wrong. Additionally, relationships take a lot of time and you have to be in a good headspace, meaning you are willing to get to know the person. After being with someone for almost three years, I would not consider myself any guru of relationships but there are two important aspects that I have learned: communication and compromise. 


Original Illustration Created in Canva for Her Campus Media

Communication is key throughout any relationship (platonic or romantic). No matter if you are just starting out or if you have been together for years. It is important to communicate what you want in a relationship. Is this just a one-time thing or are you looking for something serious? This will prevent a lot of messy moments. Being upfront is important to set boundaries and understand the needs of each other. It can be embarrasing asking these questions but it will save you time and heartbreak if that person decides this is not for them. Does this person’s morals, interests, and future pathway line up with mine?  

Are you exclusive? How often will you see each other? 

Questions about your future will not stop once you are long-term. You are always checking in with the person to understand if you on the same path. The questions will go from understanding the relationship foundation to asking them when they want to get married. Do they want kids or the thought of kids turns them off? Are they comfortable with moving far away? These are the make or break questions that usually cause a couple to break-up/divorce. 

How you communicate is also important.

  • Body Language
  • Eye Contact
  • Using “I” statements


Colorful hands
Original photo by Tim Mossholder from Unsplash

It is good to find someone with the same interests as you but it is also important to respect their differences by compromising. These differences can be something silly like action movies vs. comedy. Or they can be something bigger like outgoing vs introverted. Talk about these differences and how you can bring together what they like and what you like. Are these differences a deal-breaker? Or can you talk about these differences and come up with a solution to meet in the middle. 

  • Do not try to always be right
  • Let them have options 
  • Let it go sometimes 

Some people really just get lucky and are in the right time and place. Love is hard and that is the easiest way to sum it up. You find someone you love being around, who uplifts you, and you two can grow together. It may work and it may not. That is the scary thing about love. You never know what will happen and the only way to see is to take a chance.

Maya is currently a Senior at University of Illinois at Chicago. She is majoring in Integrated Health Studies with the goal of becoming a genetic counselor. She joined HER and is excited for all the article she will create. She enjoys staying connected with pop culture and all the new restaurants.