In my experience, the saying “when you look good, you feel good” is almost too accurate. The confidence that a good outfit or a cute hairstyle instills throughout my day truly has an impact on my performance in my classes and extracurriculars. If you can walk out of the door feeling confident about how you look, everything else just seems to fall into place. In a time when so much emphasis is placed on external appearance, this can have an even more significant impact on your day-to-day life. And unfortunately, the often-ongoing battle with acne that many college students experience is a huge weight holding you back from achieving the level of confidence you seek. I want to reassure anyone reading this that it does not have to be this way, acne should not determine your perception of your self-worth. I want to share my experience battling acne in college in the hopes of normalizing it and to help those struggling know that they aren’t alone.
Despite so many people dealing with acne, I have found that it is seldom discussed among peers and still heavily stigmatized. For some reason, having acne is often equated with being dirty or not taking good care of yourself when most of the time it is quite the opposite. I have dealt with acne since the seventh grade, and these are feelings I have struggled with frequently.
I am constantly worried about the way I will be perceived because I have acne even though I am doing everything in my power to get rid of it. For years, I spend a good portion of time every morning tirelessly trying to hide the texture on my skin and any new red spots. I have been made to feel like I cannot look my best without hiding my acne, that I am less than others because of something I cannot control. In middle school, it did not bother me too much. Without unlimited access to social media and the internet, I didn’t see it as something that was out of the norm. Unfortunately, as I have gotten older, my attitude towards my acne has only gone downhill.
Coming into college, one of my biggest concerns was how my acne was going to impact the friendships and relationships I would be able to build. Even if no one ever actually viewed me as less than or uglier, I felt that way throughout my first year here. It seemed like everyone around me had glowing skin and could walk out of their dorm with no flaws. I had been forced on birth control at a young age because I was told it would help. Almost five years later and there has been little improvement. Talking with other girls my age, I have found this is a similar experience many of us share. From the time you enter puberty, it feels like birth control is handed out like candy as a band aid for all problems a teenage girl encounters. I never felt heard by healthcare professionals because they were convinced birth control was the magic solution, even when it came nowhere close to solving the problem. Looking back, I wish I would have used my voice and spoken up about my feelings towards birth control as an acne treatment.
I have since been able to find a better doctor who listens to my concerns and works with me to formulate a plan that I feel comfortable with. If this is something you can relate to, please know that there is better out there. Do not let your embarrassment or disgust for your acne make you take medications you do not want to take or follow treatment plans you do not feel comfortable with. There are so many options out there because there are so many causes of acne. I implore you to take the time to explore and find the best option for you.
Speaking of medication, it would be hard to ignore Accutane as a treatment option for acne. You always hear scary things about Accutane, basically equating it to poisoning your body, something many people put themselves through just to gain a little extra confidence. Deciding to take a medication like Accutane is a big decision that should be thoroughly discussed with your family and healthcare professionals. For some people, it is the best decision they ever made, but for others it was a very painful experience that they would prefer to not do again. All I advise is to not let the opinions of others cloud your judgment. It may not feel like it, but you are just as beautiful and strong with acne as you would be without. Find solutions for your acne because you want to, not because others’ rude comments have influenced you to do so.
As someone who has struggled with acne for a long time, I know it is extremely difficult. You never feel like you are pretty enough, sexy enough or clean enough. It can often feel like you are doing something drastically wrong, and not taking care of yourself as well as other people. I want you to know that none of this is true. I know whoever is reading this is beautiful, capable and healthy. People get acne for all sorts of reasons, most of which are entirely out of our control. Therefore, do not let something you cannot control dictate your college experience. Walk out of your door every morning feeling confident in yourself because with or without acne, you are worth the same and should treat yourself with the same kindness either way. So put on a cute outfit, have a good hair day and ignore whatever is happening on your face. Put on a smile and know you are just as good as the pretty girl sitting next to you in class with clear skin.