One of the hardest parts of going to college for me, and I’m sure it is the same for others, was leaving my best friend behind at home. Zoe and I weren’t the type of best friends that spent every waking moment together or had to text each other every second. We still aren’t. But we share this unexplainable bond, and if you have a best friend, you know what I’m talking about.
Weeks before I left my hometown to move to Gainesville, we were so fearful of what life would be like without each other. Although we weren’t ones to spend each day together, we lived right across the street from one another.
“Meet me halfway?” We would say to each other.
Our phone conversations would go like this:
“Hey, I’m making brownies, and the recipe needs three eggs, and I only have two. Meet me halfway?”
“I forgot my charger at your house. Meet me halfway?”
These conversations are usually pretty funny and ridiculous. Our questions were always followed by a quick “of course” and we’d run out barefoot to meet in the dead of night. There was one night I was crying so hard I could barely breathe. I called her and within seconds she was standing in the middle of the road, ready to meet me halfway. We didn’t say a word. She held me under the streetlights and let me cry. After that night, “meet me halfway” meant so much more.
It was hard for both of us to accept that we would no longer going to be able to meet halfway –– instead, there would 300 miles between us. We knew we would OK, but it was scary to think about. If you have a best friend who has a piece of your soul, you’ll understand.
I came to college while Zoe was starting her junior year of high school. We were both so busy dealing with new schedules, bucket loads of assignments and our families and friends that we didn’t talk much. That never put a damper on our relationship. It made the times we could talk that much more important.
When two people go their separate ways, even if not permanently, it can go one of two ways. Those two people can slowly grow apart from one another or they can create an even stronger bond. It’s saddening to feel you and your best friend grow apart. I’ve seen it happen to other people many times, no matter the length of friendship or how intense the bond. Distance can do damage –– but, it doesn’t have to.
Although obvious, talking to one another is imperative to making a long-distance relationship with your bestie work. I suggest when you’re talking on the phone to not forget that your calls aren’t just about updating each other on what’s going on in your daily life. It is important to share the details of your life, but it’s also beneficial to just talk, rant or laugh. That’s one of the best things about friendships, right? When you can forget about the world and your problems and get lost in a conversation or endless laughter over the silliest things. Having these talks just for the sake of hearing each other’s voice is important in sustaining a connection in a long-distance relationship. It makes you remember why you love them so much in the first place.
Your best friend is someone whose opinion you trust and take to heart. Even though there is distance separating you, that doesn’t mean you can’t still help each other out. Another tip is to ask each other for advice, even about the smallest of things. If you’re out shopping and you’re debating whether to get a shirt, text them. If you’re stressed about an assignment, ask them about it. Although your best friend might not fully understand the circumstances, it’s always nice to hear what your best friend has to say about a situation. It makes it feel as if they’re there with you and no distance is separating you from them.
My last tip isn’t about phone calls or something tangible, it’s about emotion. Being able to understand and have patience are key components to having a healthy and efficient long-distance relationship with your bestie. Sometimes, they won’t be able to answer your call because that’s simply just how life works. Other times, you won’t be there to help them with whatever challenges they’re facing because of something like work or school. Both of you are growing and following your own paths in life. You both have different lives, different schedules and contrasting lifestyles. The ability to be patient and understanding one another is a crucial aspect of maintaining your irreplaceable relationship with your best friend.
Remember, don’t sweat it. There may be a distance between the both of you, but you know you share a bond with one another that is unbreakable. Like anything in life, you have to make the best of it and see where that situation takes you. Through my long-distance relationship with my best friend, I’ve learned so much about our bond. Not only has it made us closer, it has made me realize why she means so much to me.