The Things Misogynistic Men Say That Annoy Me

“These are things that feminists do or say that annoy me” is the title of a TikTok video by Troy Shepherds. Already, it is blaring red flags. The video lists 5 things that Troy claims feminists do that annoy him. 

The first one is about feminists saying, ‘men are trash.’ He goes on to making a joke about how some girls prefer having their fathers around rather than their mothers. This however completely misuses the term ‘men are trash’ as well as making light of a very serious issue. If you do not understand what is meant by a term or phrase, rather than creating problematic content, educate yourself about the meaning behind a particular term or phrase. In this case, the phrase ‘men are trash’ was popularised during the peak of the protests gender-based violence. The phrase was used to explain that your ideas of manhood are no longer fit for purpose and your lack of evolution is hurting us all. This phrase was screamed in anger and pain to all the men that have abused women in any way and to all the men that defend this behaviour. 

The second point he makes about things feminists do or say that annoy him is ‘hating white men especially if you are a white female feminist.’ The way he explains this point is by imitating a female that says to a white male that he has been privileged since he has been a baby and has been benefiting from society. Saying this point is damaging because by joking about being annoyed at the fact that a white female is educating a white male on his privilege, this makes the people that watch the video that do this think they are in the wrong - even though they are not. White people should be calling out other white people for their privilege and holding friends accountable for recognizing their privilege. This is so that they can acknowledge the injustices done to black people and POC in society. 

The third point he makes is about toxic masculinity. He gives an example of toxic masculinity by talking about two boys who fight and when the fight is resolved they fist bump each other instead of hugging each other. This is a false definition of toxic masculinity and perpetuates a false narrative of how serious the issue of toxic masculinity is. Toxic masculinities are the traditional cultural norms in terms of masculinity that are harmful to both men and women as well as to society. These are certain ideas in society of how men should be and are. An example of these ideas are things such as suppressing emotions because ‘real men do not cry’.

The fourth point is ‘women are superior.’ Troy says it annoys him when feminists claim that women have superiority. What is problematic about this is that for centuries women had to live with society and men themselves stating that they were the superior gender. Women started to take back the power to say that they are just as superior as men were. By saying that when women say they are superior it annoys you, it is saying that we should be silenced about our opinions on our gender because you, the male, are uncomfortable with that aspect. 

The fifth and most problematic point is ‘random acts of kindness seen as an attack’. The example that he gives is that a man holds the door open for a woman who in return goes on about her independence. The thing that is problematic about this is that men have the mindset that when doing something they see as kind that they should receive something back for that act regardless of the situation. Women are not indebted to a man if he has done something he perceives as kind. In the way the world is today and the way society is, women have every right to react the way she feels comfortable in a situation in which a man believes he deserves something back even if that something Is as small as a hello or a hug. Women are killed every single day even when they are doing something like going to the store, so the way we will react in a situation is the way we were taught to stay to be safe because of men that have this mindset that they deserve something in return.