Let’s set the scene. You’re walking through your favorite store in the mall, ready to find some great new additions for your closet, but you’re faced with a startling dilemma… where’s the fabric? You think to yourself that this must be a joke… is this a skirt? A shirt? No, maybe it’s a dress… but… it’s kind of too short to be a dress, maybe it’s just a long shirt?
It’s happened to me and it may have happened to you all as well, but it’s totally normal with today’s fashions. I’ve thought to myself in the past that it’s something I’m supposed to just give in to and believe is okay regardless of how uncomfortable I may feel. I’ve told myself that this is what fashion is and that in order to look fashionable, I need to show more skin. Why? For who?
There seems to be a lot of debate lately in feminist arguments that bring up the fact that women aren’t “asking for it” by the way they dress, and I think it’s a great notion. Women shouldn’t be told to cover themselves up on the basis that men can’t keep themselves from lusting over a woman showing a bit more leg or midriff. It’s true. We shouldn’t be told we have to dress a certain way in schools and public places to keep men from staring at us, I completely understand that. However, what if we’re just not comfortable?
There is a population of us who are reclaiming our modesty. It isn’t because we want to obey the patriarchal system that would rather symbolically cover up women to the point that their thoughts, actions, and strength are covered up. Rather… we just don’t feel comfortable showing that much skin.
I’ve always dressed more conservatively; it’s who I am, how I was raised, and how I feel most comfortable. Yes, I’ve worn outfits that have shown my midriff and tightly wrapped my body, but have I always felt comfortable? No, not exactly.
As I’ve gotten older, I’ve grown fonder of reclaiming my modesty. To me, it’s just as powerful of a tool to express my strength and dignity as it is for a woman to be bold enough to show more skin. It’s what makes me feel most comfortable in my own life, and what allows me to feel like I can be myself. So what’s so wrong about being modest?
Shopping in malls doesn’t make me feel empowered when I see store after store offering clothes that show too much of my body. If anything, I feel like another number in society being told that I need to dress a certain way to be a certain person; a person who is sexy, sassy, and confident while she reveals her cleavage at the same time. However, that’s not me. I believe that I can be all of those things while wearing a bandeau across my chest at the same time and what’s so bad about that?
I suppose if there were to be any call to action in my thoughts on modesty, it would be to encourage women and clothing lines to embrace the idea that many women enjoy being fashionable and modest at the same time. No, it doesn’t mean we’re boring, drab, prudish, frumpy, or “a tease”. It means that we have found a different way to reclaim our feminine power. We can gain more confidence when we can dress in a way that doesn’t make us feel anything but ourselves, all the while looking beautiful. Isn’t that something to celebrate?