Odds are, if you’re single and in college, the #1 go-to question relatives ask you is: “so, are you dating anyone?“
Unless you’re in a long-distance relationship with your high school sweetheart or fall into the small percentage of college students in committed relationships (27% according to the Journal of Developmental Psychology, 2013), you’re single.
But don’t fret; there’s nothing wrong with you. You’re not the only one.
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In fact, according to a recent study by the American Psychological Association, 1 in 3 college seniors have been on fewer than two dates. This is a reflection of the “IDC” (or, I don’t care) culture of today. In other words, a culture that glorifies being ~chill~ whether it’s with friendships or romance. Rather than express how we truly feel, we avoid transparency in fear of being perceived as sensitive or clingy. There’s a reason people say they’re talking to someone as opposed to dating or seeing them. Â
Of course, committed relationships in college haven’t been obliterated (take it from someone whose friends are all in relationships), but casual hookups have become an active sub-culture of college life. Most people don’t expect to be asked out after hooking up with someone and are more likely to receive a text or snap (maybe).Â
What once meant dinner and a movie on a Friday night has been reduced to Tinder matches, casual hookups, DFMO’s [dance floor make-outs], and 2:00 AM “wyd” texts. We’re more likely to have ‘almost lovers’: the sparks that show up and for a while, give us some hope. But then, for one reason or another, these dissipate; we break our snap streaks, eventually delete their numbers, and awkwardly wave or avoid eye contact when we see them EVERYWHERE on campus.Â
College dating is…complicated. In fact, if I had to pick a Facebook relationship status for the majority of the college student population, it would be just that: “it’s complicated.”
On that note, being single isn’t the worst. Personally, I like the freedom that comes with being on your own and having more personal time for self-growth and exploration. Just because you’re single now, doesn’t mean you’ll always be or that you’ll end up a crazy cat lady. Give yourself a break and take a deep breath. You might find your future SO tomorrow in the library, for all you know. Â
Don’t let loneliness or the fear of never finding the one lower your expectations; don’t settle for less. Instead, focus on being the best possible version of yourself- intelligent, powerful, confident, and beautiful. Remember, you are…
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