First, play Taylor Swift’s We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together at the highest volume and sing it as loud as you possibly can. You can also dance along to it and take a moment to process what just happened.
In my case, I was in an on-again-off-again relationship since my sophomore year of high school and had a lot to unpack. I thought about the first time we ever met and how it all went wrong. I was not ready to date, but I went along with it, and that was my first mistake. One month in, and he had me ugly crying and feeling like I was stupid to be in a relationship with someone.
It never really amounted to a great relationship because we were immature and too young for it to be a great love story. I have thought that if we met each other now, we probably could have been something great. However, we met each other when we were careless and made silly mistakes. We have too much history, and it is precisely why we never had a chance. Starting to talk to each other after months of not speaking was not going to repair the issues we had. Yet, whenever one of us began to miss the other more than usual, we would break and start a casual conversation. We always jumped back in and never resolved anything, and that was the creation of the vicious cycle.
But five years later, I think we both finally had enough. After a night of hanging out, he texted me, “I don’t want this anymore sorry” and I laughed a bit because it was what I messaged him a few months ago. Then I thought, “it is finally over,” and we were really never ever getting back together. A part of me was relieved because I knew the fun times we were having were not going to last very long. We usually had a month or two of fun dates until one of us felt like it wasn’t the right fit.
Since then, I binge-watched romantic comedies and made a few Spotify playlists. I prioritized self-care and tried to find happiness outside of the relationship. I rewatched the episodes of Gilmore Girls where Rory and Dean break up for the first time, Rory cries on the bathroom floor about Logan and Lorelai’s break up with Luke.
I gave myself time to feel the sadness and heartbreak, but came to terms with letting go. Breakups can be brutal when you loved the person, but the sadness will not last forever. Dancing it out helped a lot. A great playlist goes a long way.