With Valentine’s Day approaching, this also marks the start of an equally important, celebration-worthy season (to me at least). If you don’t follow it as obsessively as I do, the end of January means that we have officially entered a new season of The Bachelor. That being said, I realize that this show normally prompts one of two reactions: total investment or complete ridicule. I’m not here to tell you which one of those is the right choice – mostly because I think it should be a little bit of both – but I am here to say that years of watching the show has actually taught me some important life lessons.
So whether they actually meant to do this or not, here’s what the Bachelor franchise has taught me about love.
The first lesson? Love takes time to grow. You may be surprised to discover that women who receive the first impression rose on night one have never won the show. Not even once! While I am a hopeless romantic, I’ve taken this to mean that “love at first sight” might not lead to a happily ever after. Real relationships need time to develop through getting to know the other person.
My second big takeaway (which may seem a little obvious) is that being yourself really DOES lead to love, even on a heavily orchestrated TV show. The girls that end up engaged and happily married are never the so-called villains who “aren’t there to make friends”, but rather the girls who go into the show focused on looking for a real connection.
The third lesson that The Bachelor has shown me is to manage your expectations. I can’t even tell you how many times a contestant on this show has been shocked that the Bachelor/Bachelorette is kissing and dating other people when this is in fact… the premise of the show. Obviously this exact scenario doesn’t translate to real life, but the principle remains the same: set boundaries and know what you’re getting yourself into before jumping into a relationship headfirst!
Ultimately, I would say this show is generally a manual for what NOT to do in a relationship rather than a guide on how to find love. The good thing is that this still provides valuable lessons that are worth considering, if you can manage to get past the entertainment of Fantasy Suites and Rose Ceremonies. I figure if I’m going to be tuning in every single Monday multiple times a year, I should at least try to get something more out of it. And my final takeaway? If you do end up on the show, wait it out and make it to Bachelor in Paradise. You are WAY more likely to find love there.