She wants it? She gets it. Whether it be a spot on the hit television show ‘The Voice,’ a Grammy, or her newest man Ethan Slater, this is a slogan that has encompassed Ariana Grande’s expansive career long before her ‘Thank U, Next’ era. Once a mantra that stood as a testament to her work ethic and confidence, some audiences now look at Grande and mottos like this in a different light. In the past few months, Grande has faced homewrecker allegations following the news of her relationship with ‘Wicked’ co-star Ethan Slater – a label that has become more relevant with one of her latest singles “Yes, And?” in which she stands her ground on the idea that one’s opinion of themselves is the only opinion that matters.
Amid the homewrecker allegations, listeners have been inspecting Grande’s music to a greater degree, noting hints of internalized misogyny. Arguably one of the most glaring examples of this is found in her hit song “Break Up With Your Girlfriend, I’m Bored,” where she aims to convince a man she is attracted to to leave his girlfriend for her. In the song, Grande claims that the other woman “can’t compare” and that she is only “hatin’” on the other girl because she wants him. It’s phrases like these that have rubbed even the passive listener the wrong way as it is suggestive to women that other women are their competition – a concept that can be damaging to the minds of younger audiences and the feminist movement as a whole.
Moreover, the song can easily be said to promote the internalization of the idea that women are objects for men’s pleasure as Grande promises sexual favors to the man to win his attention. A prime example of this is the repeated line “You could hit it in the mornin’… like it’s yours” throughout the chorus. Clearly, the song does a huge disservice to feminism as it pits women against one another, and worse, for the attention of a man. However, it is important to note that Grande’s lyrics can also be seen as an attempt to empower women by showing how the misogynistic view of women can be leveraged into power to get what they want. This point is further made in the music video as Grande is seen kissing the girlfriend at the end of the video, which implies she used her sensuality to convince the man to give her what she truly wanted.
In fact, a good deal of Grande’s music celebrates women in this same way by touching on the concept of embracing femininity and sensuality. The most notable example of this is drawn from her 2018 album ‘Sweetener,’ which includes a variety of uplifting messages for young women regarding the importance of self-love and confidence. A stand-out track that encompasses all of these ideals is none other than “God is a Woman.” In this song, Ariana sings about the power a woman holds through self-expression and bodily autonomy. While to the untrained ear it may come off as a song about Grande’s personal sexual endeavors, a closer look can reveal her continuous theme of supporting women by embracing her own sensuality and feminine qualities. Of course, it should be noted that this song was released in 2018, long before any homewrecker allegations came to light. In today’s climate, a track like this would only fuel the perspective that Grande unapologetically leans into both her sensuality and sexuality without concern for whom it may hurt.
Unsurprisingly, the discourse surrounding Grande and her music has only heightened following the release of her newest album ‘Eternal Sunshine.’ While most long-time ‘Arianators’ have taken to social media to show their support for the music, others have “broken up” with the artist amid public criticism. The scrutiny the “We Can’t Be Friends,” singer is under circles back to the age-old debate of if art can and should be separated from the artist that creates it. However, in the case of Grande, the grounds for her cancellation as an artist are based on speculation rather than her exact words or actions. Once her relationship with Ethan Slater came to light, any comment she has made has been heavily scrutinized. The most prominent example of this again comes from her single “Yes, And?” as media sources and fans interpreted it to be a statement confirming the homewrecker allegations and voicing her unapologetic stance. However, lyrics and music videos are open to interpretation by everyone and can be ambiguous depending on the artist’s intentions. From the perspective of others, this was not Grande’s intention at all, and believe she was simply reminding others and herself that the opinion of someone else does not define you.
If you ask me, Grande’s personal relations team is the real artist here. There is no mistaking the perfectly crafted timeline between the homewrecker allegations and the release of “Yes, And?” a song that was more than likely to stir the pot. It was with this that Grande, who had not released an album in four years, suddenly skyrocketed back to her original relevance. As they say, any press is good press. It is also worth mentioning that this information was released suspiciously close to the announcement of Eternal Sunshine and the Wicked movie, leaving most to regard it as a publicity stunt. In my eyes, it is evident that Ariana’s personal relations team knew exactly when and how to use her discretions to bring her back into the spotlight, how to stir up even greater animosity toward her, and simultaneously smooth matters over with her fans.
Not to mention, this glaring marketing ploy comes hot off the tail(feather) of pop star Sabrina Carpenter’s increasing success. The “Feather” singer found herself facing homewrecker allegations following her relationship with ‘High School Musical: The Musical: The Series’ star Joshua Bassett and, in the same fashion as Grande, released an album shortly thereafter. Thanks to similarities abound, fans have taken to social media to praise what they are coining the “homewrecker allegations to releasing your best album” pipeline. Yet, there is one striking difference between Carpenter and Grande’s situations: Grande was actually romantically involved with a taken man and a married one at that.
At the end of the day, I hold fast to the idea that women are complex and that in the grand scheme, we know very little about what goes on in a celebrity’s personal life. However, I am a firm believer that the discourse surrounding Grande actually promotes feminism by acting as a conversation starter as divisive as the topic may be. It leads us to ask ourselves, “Is the media villainizing yet another woman for being confident and unapologetic for her tenacity and success? Or are we appropriately calling out poor behavior, namely disrespecting other women for the attention of a man?” It is that decision that I will leave up to you… your opinion matters, “Say that sh*t with your chest.”