People ask me all the time if I feel the “L Word” is being thrown around too lightly these days. My response is usually something along the lines of, “Yeah, that and ‘sucks to suck’ or ‘I’m so shook’ or even ‘That’s so fire.’ Why am I comparing the word Love to catchphrases? I don’t want to live to see the day when love becomes a cliché. I came to the realization that the word Love has become an overused expression in everyday jargon. I feel as though we could be showing a little more respect to the word as much more than just a term of endearment, but a mental and emotional commitment that so many people have been throwing away like gum wrappers.
I suppose it is time to state the obvious; we love because we feel the need to do so, and we do so because we have no other way of expressing the chaos of emotions that any form of admiration brings a person. You love your parents, you love your siblings, you love your closest and most personal friends, and you love your significant others (hopefully). However, I hear people talk about how they love their favorite singer, or how the absolutely love the way Brad Pitt and/or his stuntman executed that last jump over an exploding building. This would all be fine in a perfect world, but when your feet touchdown in real life, you start to question, how can you love someone you’ve never met?
It has come to my attention that our young generation, in a society as groundbreaking and progressive as ours, are confusing feelings of idolization and infatuation with love itself. It’s perfectly fine to swoon over celebrities that are perpetuated in our culture, or to even buy their memorabilia. By all means, hang posters! But always remember the difference in context. Let us look at three statements: “I love my best friend,” “I love my new car,” and “I love lasagna piled to the brim with Parmesan cheese and garlic bread.” Do we see the difference?
I’m not sure if you are all aware of this, but some girls say certain things that usually gain nothing but miscommunication, yet guys end up being the reason for the miscommunication. They fail to distinguish between the phrases “Love you…” and “Love ya!” You’re probably sitting there thinking, “Well this doesn’t sound like that big of a deal. He’s overreacting, and I’ve never done that,” but I can assure you that it poses a threat to the fragile states of emotion that guys have but will never admit to having. It’s a state of delicacy that we as a male species are somewhat guilty of subscribing to. If you’re not going to be specific with us, then we’re going to assume too much. However, we too are at fault because, as you all know, it takes two to tango. Many of us overanalyze what we’re told, and never once will we admit to our confusion and end up dragging out the situation until it ends violently, tragically, or all of the above.
I don’t want you to think that I myself am innocent to this argument. I too have made it a habit to use the word “love” in a much broader sense than originally intended. Similarly to all of you, I am a product of my environment and victim of my college surroundings. It might be the media or it might be subliminal messages in top forty hits in music, but the bottom line is, we are using one of history’s oldest and most valued words to make a statement about something we think we like or a trend that we know we’ll outgrow sometime in the next eleven minutes. For example, I would definitely believe you if you were to tell me that you loved your parents, your pet, or even your big sister in your sorority. However, I can assure you that you don’t love Mike Posner, Justin Bieber, or Justin Timberlake; you admire the words they wrote down on paper and then later made into a song for you to enjoy in the car or when you straighten your hair as you get ready for class. And guys, trust me when I say Natalie Portman and Mila Kunis make the best duo since John and Kate (pre-Ed Hardy), but I believe you admire a celebrity’s talents, find truth in the things they do or sing about, and even become infatuated with the idea of them at times. When you’ve never met someone, looked that person in the eye, or had any form of conversation with that person, then I can guarantee you that “Love” is probably the most inappropriate word to use in this context. Literature calls it a malapropism and I can just water that down and call it juvenile.
In my humble opinion, I believe we all use the word “Love” in many situations because we secretly want that love back in return. If we can somehow channel all the positivity we feel in our hearts into something deeper than simple admiration or idolization, then perhaps we would receive that same level of totality in return. It’s just a hypothesis, but it makes more sense than it seems. Almost every person you pass in the street has done at least one thing that day to seek approval from another person. It doesn’t even matter whom from because, the point is, they sought acknowledgement in return.
Ladies and Gentlemen, the moral of the story is to recognize what love means to you. My philosophy is to only say the word to those who deserve it, and know that preserving it makes it that much better when you’re finally ready to use it. Forgive me for the cliché, but I hope you love the advice.