SPOILER ALERT: If you aren’t caught up with On My Block, this article does contain spoilers.
The season two premiere of On My Block didn’t fail to deliver on all fronts. The finale had Cesar and Monse feels, an identity crisis, long-lost parents, securing the bag and—the most important detail of all—who dies. I can’t be the only one who was waiting with bated breath to see who survived after that uber-dramatic season one finale. With all our burning questions answered, we also got a little more this season (okay, a lot more) in terms of underlying themes to examine.
Our unofficial/official fave, Ruby, is seen in the season premiere beginning his journey of dealing with everything that comes with being a gun violence survivor. This storyline continues all the way until the end of the season. Unfortunately, this isn’t just some dramatic concept the writers came up to keep us glued to our seats till the end. Gun violence is a major issue affecting our country today, and Ruby’s experience is one that many viewers can sympathize with. Including myself.
1. The morning-after grief
Throughout season two, we watch Ruby struggle with the weight of his grief. It’s portrayed in such a humane and realistic way that it hits audiences right in the feels, but doesn’t make it clickbait. I have lived through this myself. The loss of faith in your religion because you couldn’t believe that a higher power would take your loved one that way and leave you to deal with the pain. The happy days and then the not-so-okay days where all you do is lay in bed and cry. The numbness that prevents you from crying that is sometimes a blessing because it lets you get through some of the harder days. I felt Ruby’s pain like it was my own and grieved all over again with him.
2. The anger
In the grieving process, there’s so much anger along with confusion, pain and every other emotion under the sun. That anger, though, is a beast all on its own. We see Ruby hit his boiling point with Spooky and it begins an unlikely but surprisingly cute relationship between them. While we may feel that we are the only ones feeling what we feel or going through what we go through, we aren’t, and sometimes it may be the unexpected people in your life that you end up relating to. I have come across so many people who I went to school with, followed on social media or even were complete strangers to me that were able to understand my anger and my feeling of betrayal towards life. These same people helped me make my peace with that little boulder on my shoulder and I began to lose some of that rage.
3. The PTSD
From the moment the fireworks go off and all Ruby can hear is Olivia’s screams and the gunshot, to the song that plays at the dance (the same one he and Olivia danced to that fateful night), Rudy is plagued by his frequent panic attacks. Ruby’s battle with post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) is one of the unspoken and all too common “gifts” that survivors have after an experience like this. I can’t listen to certain songs because it’ll make me remember my friend’s laugh or him singing the lyrics. I can’t look at the color purple the same because it was his favorite. Sometimes, loud sharp noises remind me of a gunshot, and I will start to panic. PTSD is the little monster on your shoulder that doesn’t always go away when you want it to, or at all.
4. The healing
There’s a light at the end of the tunnel and Ruby’s day-to-day life shows that it’s not always this grand experience. Sometimes it’s that person who you’ve never looked at before giving you moments of comfort and peace (put some respect on my girl Jasmine!). It can also be throwing yourself into party planning, showing folks how it’s done on the dance floor or even flirting with your friend’s new valley gal pals. For me, it’s been remembering the funny things my friend said, listening to his sage advise of making sure you have a good time doing everything and taking the chances that I would’ve never taken before. Healing doesn’t ever look the same, and it isn’t linear or instantaneous.
If you’re looking for laughs, a great dose of young love, tips on how to secure the bag or just need a good cry, On My Block brings it all and more to the table. Let me know how your weekend long binge goes!