As difficult as it may be, at some point everyone will lose someone that they love, cherish and/or look up to. Grieving is not a bad thing throughout this. In fact, it is completely necessary and is a form of coping.
Everyone copes differently. Whether it be venting on social media, writing about it, crying or even getting angry. It is definitely hard to cope with the loss of a loved one, especially if you are under deep pressure as far as schoolwork goes. Coping is not easy but it is possible.
How can I make the pain go away?
You must allow yourself to grieve. This may sound extremely cliché but it can be extremely difficult for some people. Many people attempt to shut the world out and completely ignore the fact that they lost someone very near to them. Remember, the more you ignore the pain the longer it lingers and builds.
Also, remember the happy times that you shared with that person and celebrate moments that remind you of them. When you find an old picture or hear an old song that reminded you of them, feel happy instead of feeling sad for them. Remember what made you love them in the first place.
Let people in. Don’t shut everyone out. Shutting people out will make the grieving process so much more difficult for you. Although you may not want it at first, having company will take your mind off of the loss for a little while. Being with others who are grieving, especially over the same person, will also help a lot with the process.
And if you are religious, allow others to pray with you over your loss. God can bring you great joy when you feel as though it is impossible!
Seek support in things rather than people – books, bike rides, nature walks, workouts – things that will clear your head and relax your mind.
Balance out your schoolwork and talk to your professors. Nine times out of ten, your professors will understand that you are dealing with a loss, and they will cut you some slack as far as work goes. Do not, however, rely on this and/or use the death of your loved one as an excuse.
Grief is a personal thing, and unfortunately, no one will be able to specifically help you feel better. You are always going to miss them. There will be times when you begin to miss them and you may cry (this may especially happen during anniversaries). And that’s okay. Once you are ready, you can get back into your normal routine and it will make things a lot easier. Coping is much easier when you are staying busy.
Losing someone that is very near and dear to your heart is not easy, but it is absolutely doable.
In loving memory of Matthew Carl Miller(1992-2014)
I miss you, but I know that you are no longer with pain and are sitting with Jesus. I’ll see you in Heaven someday soon, you crazy ginger!