When your close friend tells you that she is falling for someone new, you should be happy for her, right? Yes, you should be, but not when your friend is a “repeat boyfriend offender.” These ladies have been wifed up since middle school with, literally, not even a solid month of singleness. They move from guy to guy as every season changes, and swear they are in love! As soon as they get bored, they break-up with their current boy-toy and move onto the next one without any hesitation. Serial daters take the phrase “single and ready to mingle” a little too seriously, because they mingle their way into another relationship in no time! Every girl knows someone who falls into this category. These offenders are like chameleons: They do not have a true sense of self, and transform into what they believe their current boy-toy would be attracted to. She does not have a solid group of girlfriends to save her from this nonsense relationship because she ditched them three boyfriends ago! As strong, dependent, and successful women of the 21st century, we must not allow boys to define who we are!
Here are some key pointers to avoid becoming a “repeat boyfriend offender”:
Treasuring Female Friendships
As my icon Carrie Bradshaw puts it, “Maybe our girlfriends are our soul mates, and guys are just people to have fun with.” Female friendships are truly like gems. Women know women better than any man you’ll ever meet. Having quality friendships does not mean that you cannot also have a serious and meaningful relationship. It simply means that you will have someone there to pull you out of a negative relationship when you are too blinded by “love” to see it. It is also great to have women around so you can enjoy doing girlish things without annoying him, because he doesn’t want to listen to you gossip as much as you do not want to watch him play XBOX. Just remember that a girl’s night should be as much of a priority as a date night.
Taking Time for Yourself
Before jumping into a serious relationship, a girl truly needs to know who she is. A “repeat boyfriend offender” is a girl who changes herself for every boyfriend, which is problematic because she forgets what makes her unique! How can a guy love you for you, when you do not even know who you are? Taking time for yourself, to really understand who you are, can help determine if your current boy-toy is worth your precious time. Take time for yourself by picking up a hobby that relaxes you. I enjoy running, which helps clear my mind and helps me focus on myself.
It’s Okay to be Single!
Ladies, listen closely. Being single is not a bad thing. Women these days need to realize that being single does not mean you will forever be the Crazy Cat Lady. “Repeat boyfriend offenders” are afraid of the “S” word, so they will date just about any Joe Shmo. There is no need to date someone average just to be in a relationship. By doing so, you could be missing out on your prince charming! All women need to be single at some point in their lives so they can take time for themselves and their girlfriends!
Don’t confuse girls in long-term relationships as committing any wrongdoing. If you are in a successful relationship that makes you happy, and you also make time for your friends, then more power to you, girlfriend! To avoid becoming a “repeat boyfriend offender” you need to cherish your female friendships, take time for yourself, and accept the notion that being single is okay! I do not want you lovely ladies to wake up one day regretting anything, because you only live this journey called Life once, so live it in pursuit of your ultimate happiness!