Class starts. The professor trundles to the front, lectures for 50 minutes, and leaves – presumably to go grade a few papers, ignore some emails, and then hibernate until class time tomorrow. But what do professors ACTUALLY do in their spare time? Do they live real lives? Have hobbies?
I came into UCF with the answers to some of these questions, gathered through 19 years of immersive research – in other words, my mom and dad both work as college professors. This led to an interesting blend of preconceptions and expectations. After my first semester at college, I came to view both my parents and my current professors in a new light.
And now, here are 6 things you might not know about college professors, unless you’ve lived with two of them for your whole life.
1. If you send your professor a humorously worded or ragingly furious email, be prepared for it to be read aloud to their family at dinner. I’ve heard some great ones.
2. Professors treat finals week like we students treat syllabus week. I remember calling my mom during finals week last semester, and she starts ratting off all the department parties and holiday festivities she had coming up. Meanwhile, I was deciding whether or not I would be sleeping that night. More than a little peeved, I pointed out this disparity.
“Sure, finals week is tough for you guys,” she responded. “But it makes up for syllabus week, when we’re working like crazy to get our courses prepped, and the students are all out partying.” Touché, mom. Touché.
3. Sometimes when your professor cancels class, it’s because their kids had a soccer game or a school play or the flu. Sometimes, they were thinking about canceling class, and their college-aged daughter was like, “YAS DAD YOU CANCEL CLASS, GIVE THOSE POOR SOULS THEIR MORNING BACK,” and it just might have made a difference.
4. Professors are this intriguing breed of hyper-academic humans that discovered a subject so fascinating, their idea of a good time was to go study it for 12 years, then turn around and teach it for the next 40. Kind of mind-boggling, but also super cool. As a result, professors are literally the biggest nerds about their area of study.
What do biology professors do in their spare time? For the most part, more biology things. Reading cool biology articles, watching biology documentaries, and conducting mini biology experiments in the kitchen… usually followed by telling their kids alllllll about it.
5. At parties, professors totally sit around and talk about ridiculous stuff their students have done. My dad has this great story about a student who fell asleep propped up on one arm, then slipped and smacked his face on the desk – right into the puddle of drool he’d been producing. His colleagues love it, and will usually counter with some hilarious story about a botched cheating attempt. So, be warned – if you ever do something mildly comical around your professor, it may be added to his or her arsenal of party stories.
6. The funniest thing in the world? Reading your parents’ reviews on Rate My Professor. (And being SO RELEIVED neither of them got a chili pepper).