There's So Much I Want to Say

There is so much I want to talk about –  myself, my relationships, my family, my life at Davis, my life back at home, politics, sexual assault awareness, mental health awareness, Greek life, sports, and so, so much more, but I have such a hard time writing it.

Unfinished articles have filled my computer, each trailing off with a “...” and a “TBD.” I look at these articles with both hope and disappointment. It’s hard to watch article topics get less and less applicable to our current world, but I truly believe I’ll finish them one day. I just wish I could make that day come sooner.

I don’t know what it is – maybe it’s writer’s block or even fear – but something stops me every time I sit down to write. I’ve been able to get some stuff out, as I have to if I’m pursuing a career in writing, but I feel like I have so much more to say about the topics I really care about.

It’s hard for me to tell if my blockage is due to internal or external factors. Is it my own fear of not being credible or good enough to be a published writer? Or is it the negative reactions that inevitably come with writing about something controversial?

I wish so dearly that I could just take my feelings and lay them all out there, but I’m just not there yet. With openness comes vulnerability, and there is something about putting your emotions in published writing that feels so exposing. So for now, I’ll just write about how I can’t write.