I just very recently turned twenty. As much as I longed to turn twenty (who wouldn’t, after all, you are a year closer to being an ‘adult’), the past year as a nineteen-year-old adolescent was a challenge like no other. Honestly, I have always been someone who looks to the positive side of things, no matter what life throws at me. I always try to understand why something is going the way it is, the lesson it is teaching me, and most importantly how it was necessary to shape me into the woman I am becoming. It’s a process, even Rome wasn’t built in a day! As we approach 2024, I started to think about the mindset I wanted to take forward with me in the coming year.
Reflecting on 19, I am sitting to highlight the experiences and lessons that defined this year, and some I wish to take with me to start my twenties!
- HURT TO HEAL
As someone who pathologically worries and dwells on the past, I can vouch that I have gone through my fair share of hurt. In a conversation with a friend where I was overanalyzing the reason why people I cared so deeply for hurt me, she quite callously told me that I care too much. Well, is it wrong to care too much?
Sometimes you expect people to give you the same efforts in return, but guess what, not everyone’s the same, and not everyone values you the same in return. You won’t always be able to seek closure for why they treated you the way they did or why they did not care to lose you. To heal, you will have to face the hurt and it’ll make you recognize your self-worth and only make you stronger!
- NO LONGER CHOOSE WHAT OR WHO DOESN’T SERVE YOU
LET GO!
Often easier said than done, especially coming from me. It takes guts to let yourself go, and remove yourself from a situation that no longer serves you. People grow, people change, and detaching from certain people is one of the many challenges life throws at you. You need to understand that nothing could be wrong with you or the relationship you share with the person. Acknowledging and realizing that you both no longer contribute to each other’s wellbeing, is a step towards prioritizing yourself and avoiding the foreseeable hurt the two would otherwise have endured.
- “YOU’RE ON YOUR OWN KID”
At the end of the day, you are going to be there for yourself, NO ONE ELSE!
It is so easy to lose yourself amidst the hustle and bustle of academics and daily activities, that you forget to make time for yourself and the small things that bring you joy. I love dancing, I used to dance for hours every day when I was back home. Ever since the hectic schedule and overload of work in university, I have felt immensely disoriented at times. Making time to dance at least once a week, made me feel connected to who I am. Even dancing for thirty minutes would make me rejuvenated and help me concentrate more on my academics.
Who we are in our twenties, for the better or worse, shapes who we become as people in the remainder of our lives. Reinventing myself, letting go, and focusing on things that serve me is what I hope to continue to follow in 2024!