The only New Year’s Resolution I successfully accomplished last year was hitting my Goodreads reading goal. And while I managed to read a staggering quantity of books, the quality of these books was incredibly disappointing. In no particular order, here are the five worst books I read in 2022.
- The Bodyguard by Katherine Center
The first line made me want to pretend I had never heard of it. Yet, I persevered past “my mother’s dying wish for me to take a vacation.” The book is an inventive take on the classic bodyguard romance, with a fake dating twist. The book is filled with unimaginative, and borderline lazy writing. The reader is meant to be dazzled by her two-chapter description of her glamorous bodyguard job, but it comes across as reminiscent of “Spy Kids.” I personally found it hard to take the girl, who had been dumped by her ex-boyfriend for being a bad kisser, seriously when discussing snipers. The fake dating plot was overshadowed by a confusing subplot involving a mystery stalker. Overall, the characters were boring, the romance uninteresting, and the plot elementary.
- The Maidens by Alex Michaelides
Alex Michaelides was given so much praise for his debut novel, The Silent Patient, yet The Maidens was a disappointment. Mariana Andros is a psychotherapist grieving the loss of her husband. She takes on the role of an amateur detective when her niece’s best friend is murdered at Cambridge. Consumed with the mystery, she is stalked by a former patient and physic love interest. The novel tries too hard to be suspenseful and the writing is often interrupted with encyclopedia-like explanations of psychology. The dialogue does not create the intended effect of a thriller, but a bad melodrama. I won’t spoil the plot twist, however unbelievable it was.
- Ugly Love by Colleen Hoover
Colleen Hoover is the Lana Del Ray of the romance genre. If you could call her brand of writing romance, which I’m not sure I would. Ugly Love is the friends-with-benefits to love story no one ever really asked for. Tate meets Miles sprawled drunk on the floor, and still finds him attractive. The book would more aptly be named Red Flags 101, although I doubt it would be very instructional seeing as Tate chooses to ignore all (of Miles’ burning red flags. The book alternates between Miles’ past trauma and Miles and Tate having sex. I don’t know what was worse, Miles hooking up with his step-sister or Tate thinking he could fix him. There was no romance, just lust.
- Anxious People by Fredrick Backman
If you can’t good mystery, don’t write one. Viewers of an open house become trapped when a bank robber enters the apartment and takes them all, hostage. The eclectic group of eight people is revealed and analyzed through some of the worst plot development I’ve ever seen. The writing rambles on and the plot is never quite clear. Whenever I returned to the book after putting it down, I would have to reread two or three chapters just to get my bearings, only to still be confused. The attempts at humor were painful and I could die a happy woman without ever reading about a nude bunny. (I honestly still don’t understand that plotline.) Backman is great but Anxious People was a massive disappointment.
- We’ll Always Have Summer by Jenny Han
I read The Summer I Turned Pretty trilogy after the release of the Amazon Prime series. The main character Belly, short for Isabella, grew up with twins Jeremiah and Conrad. The children reunited every summer at a lake house, as their moms were best friends. By the third book, Belly is meant to be a mature adult; one would expect her to be over her childhood crush on Conrad and be committed to her fiancee Jeremiah. But instead, she finds herself torn between Jeremiah and his cheating and Conrad and his emotional unavailability. Personally, I thought Belly would benefit from meeting someone outside the Fisher DNA pool, but each to their own. Overall, this book was a badly written end to what could have been an amazing coming-of-age story.