I believe for the most part, I have matured and grown into the responsibilities expected of me as a seasoned college student: paying monthly rent and utilities, paying off my credit card bills, and keeping up (for the most part) with my chores. But recently, as my 21st birthday creeps closer, I can’t help but wonder if I have matured enough to take on the newfound responsibilities I’ll have to face as I enter the last year and a half as a student: Figuring out what I plan on doing after graduation and planning internships to help build my resume, not to mention figuring out whether or not I plan on moving out to my own place, or back in with my parents.
Growing up is stressful, and I am sure we all have our own experiences that attribute to this. There is this constant push and pull of breaking out of our comfort zone with the help of friends and/or family. I have had my fair share of being placed in uncomfortable situations in order to grow beyond my small circle of comfort. Looking back, although at the time it was unpleasant, I’m grateful because it is through those experiences I am the person I am today.
So then, why am I so anxious about the age 21? Perhaps it’s the one age society seems to highlight and emphasize. Perhaps it’s because of this expectation that your 21st is supposed to be one of the best years of your life; that I am anxious about not living up to this ideal.
I know that when I actually turn 21, I won’t feel that much different. If anything, I might feel a little weird about showing my ID to the cash register when buying alcohol, but I know that nothing dramatic will change in me internally to make me feel so different. It will be like any other birthday. I’ll be a little older, and the changes I see in myself both physically and internally will be the result of many months of working on myself.
This overly romanticized idea that your 20s are the best times of your life personally doesn’t sit right with me. I think overemphasizing or stressing the need to have the best times of your life in the span of 10 years is unrealistic; everyone’s walk through life is different. For some, it may be true that their 20s were their prime times. For others, it may not be the case at all. As I spend the last couple of weeks in my 20s, I think I will continue to reflect on what goals I would like to continue to pursue into my 21st birthday, and continue to remind myself that the age 21 is nothing more than another birthday and that I will strive to live life to the fullest, but not be discouraged if I fall short of society’s expectations of what “living life to the fullest” is.