It seems to be a Generation Z phenomenon, but many of us do not want kids. I don’t speak for everyone in my generation, but it is surprisingly widespread. Why is it that so many of us don’t want kids? Why do I not wish to have kids (at least not any time soon)?
Financial Stability
As a kid who grew up in a low-income household, I think one of the driving forces for not wanting kids is how I grew up. It’s not fun growing up poor, it really isn’t. The anxiety and embarrassment in public knowing you can’t afford the finer things as other people can. Growing up poor, you have a greater understanding of the value of money and want financial stability. You become aware of the unfortunate reality that kids are a financial burden because they are expensive; like a kid who grew up like this, it makes you feel bad. Thinking that it’s your fault that your parents can’t be living better because they have kids, even though it’s not your fault. Poor children become extremely conscience financially, constantly worrying about money and overanalyzing what should and shouldn’t be bought. The impact that one thing you want to buy now may affect what you HAVE to pay for in the future.
Generational Trauma
I’m not a stranger to people having kids young, as most of my family had children and were married when they were teenagers—seeing that at a young age, seeing how young teens who weren’t prepared to take care of themselves, let alone children. That reality is all too real for me and something I’ve always been scared of. While my family members did a decent job raising their children young, it doesn’t change the things they missed, the anger, the resentment, and the difference between generations that arise.
Unsure Future
I don’t know where my life is going, or where I’ll be in a few years. Will I have a stable job? Will I be comfortable and happy? Will I want to care for another being? These are all unanswered questions that can be answered and still altered at any point in my life. I’d like to hope that I’ll be in a position in my life in the future where I do want children, but as of right now, as someone who still feels like they have a lot of discovering to do, I don’t think having kids is in my mind.
Changing Times
I, for one, have no idea where I’ll be going in my life, and with current political climates, what will happen to my rights for the privacy of my own body, of all women’s bodies? The threat of bodily autonomy always seems to be up for debate, but the reality is: the government should not be allowed to tell women what to do with their bodies. The truth is if I ever feel like I don’t want kids and somehow end up having them when I don’t have the means to care for them, my right to choose may not be a right anymore; it may be illegal for me to choose. Thankfully I live in California, where our governor understands the importance of bodily autonomy for women, but that is not the case for everyone, every state, and every country. It is a terrifying reality that we have to live with and fight against.
There are so many factors that go into people wanting children. It’s okay if you never have children. It’s okay if you’re scared to have children. It’s okay to foster and adopt children. It’s okay to wait to have children. That is a decision of your own that no one else should control, and it is entirely up to you if you believe you are ready.