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Sex + Relationships

How it Feels to Finally Be in a Loving Relationship After Feeling Unworthy of Love

Unfortunately, I’ve had my run of bad luck when it came to dating and relationships. I was always stuck in the position of questioning my self-worth and doubts with past people. These people made me feel like I was the problem and that I wasn’t deserving of the fairy-tale, movie romance I’ve always wanted. Until out of nowhere, I was swept off my feet in the most unexpected way. 

Lo and behold, I met someone who marks every little check box in what I’ve always searched for in a partner. I finally felt butterflies once again and I felt the adrenaline rush of being with someone who expressed their affection and love in a reciprocated way. 

A man and woman standing in front of a oven cooking.
Photo by Soroush Karimi from Unsplash

For the first time, I’m finally with someone who is open, vulnerable, and is so amazing with communication and reassurance. The both of us simply understand one another and our love languages. He reminds me every day of how much he loves me and expresses it in any way possible, small or big. It leaves me in shock because all of these nice things are so new to me, but it showed me that the right person had to come along to prove that what I wanted was out there.

man and woman kissing on stairs
Photo by Eduardo Pastor from Unsplash

He even took us on a trip to San Francisco and surprised me by playing a song I’d always wanted to hear when driving down the city. This left me in awe because it showed me that he also reads through my articles that I write and pays attention to everything I’m passionate about. Nonetheless, my boyfriend has been the most supportive person that I have been with and has made me the happiest person right now. Our only minuscule struggle is that we live somewhat far away from each other, but even that doesn’t stop him from trying his hardest to show his continuous, consistent love, care, & support. 

All of those terrible bad experiences were needed in order to help show me what I truly deserve and that I was worthy of being loved, and being able to give my love back to someone. They helped me grow into who I am today and to help me prepare so that when I do end up finally receiving the love that I deserve, I need to cherish it with my entire heart and enjoy every second of it. 

holding hands
Photo by Joe Yates from Unsplash

I think the saying “love comes in the most unexpected time and it comes when you aren’t looking,” is true for me in this case because I would have never believed to have gotten so lucky with meeting the person that I’m with now. I’m finally with someone who’s not afraid to tell me that they love me every single day and actually mean it when they say it. It just feels like a breath of fresh air to finally be in a mature and loving relationship with someone for the first time and I can’t wait to see it grow on out from here. 

Jasmine Aguirre

UC Riverside '21

I am a 3rd year Media & Cultural Studies major. I aspire to communicate through written word, in hopes that we can all learn something along the way. I have a huge passion for music, poetry, & art. When I'm not writing, you can find me listening to music, drinking coffee, or napping with my two orange cats, Archie & Leo.
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