Living with others is nothing new for many. I grew up in a large family and moved out at 18 to stay with another family. I have virtually always shared a room and communal spaces, so, going to college, I thought I was prepared to have roommates. However, I’m in on-campus housing, and having random assignment roommates is a whole other ballpark.
I’m one of five girls living in an apartment that UC Berkeley placed me in based on roughly five questions like “How much do you value cleanliness?” and “When do you go to bed?” Despite being matched with very little detail, my apartment functions well, but that’s not to say it’s easy.
Many people don’t become best friends with their roommates, but, within my double, I’ve grown close to my roommate. Considering the close quarters you share with a roommate, I think it’s important to have some sort of relationship. I can’t imagine sleeping in the same room as someone every day and not being able to have small talk about our days at the least. This stems from a larger skill that’s important for living with others: communication.
The times I’ve been frustrated whilst living with others is purely from a lack of communication. I’ve seen apartment mates use other people’s kitchenware without permission and ultimately cause conflict when simply asking would have avoided the strife. It can be daunting to voice your opinion, but, more often than not, it’s worse to avoid the problem than the discomfort of being honest.
Something I actively tried to prioritize while living with roommates was self-awareness. I always keep in mind that I’m using a shared space and actively do my best to maintain it. I have only gained good habits from this mentality. I always do my dishes after cooking and if I see the garbage full, I’ll take it out. Having roommates that lack this consideration makes it harder to keep up these habits, and it builds animosity. Cleanliness is a facet of self-awareness as well. People don’t always have time to immediately do their dishes or fold all their clothes, but large cases of messiness, such as molding food or unpleasant odors, cross that threshold.
Living with others isn’t easy, but it doesn’t have to be difficult either. In college you’re constantly sharing spaces and having that open line of communication and self-awareness for those you live with can make the experience more enjoyable for all parties.