Late-night laughter echoing through dorm rooms, heartfelt conversations over steaming mugs of coffee, and an unwavering sisterhood that survives the trials of college life; this is just a peek into the wonderful experiences college friendships among women can bring. While college is a time for education and career advancement, it’s also a time to create friendships that will leave lasting impacts on your life. There are a multitude of benefits for cultivating deep bonds with other women, and through this article I aim to showcase the many ways friendship can elevate multiple aspects of your campus experience.
One of the most obvious benefits of friendship is the pure fun and enjoyment of spending time with friends. When experiencing stress during midterm season, homesickness, or having pages of extensive reading, being able to balance schoolwork with spending time with friends makes the college experience less draining.
While it may seem intimidating being surrounded by a whole school of new people you don’t know, this also means there are new opportunities to make friends all around you.
“I just met most of my college friends about a week ago yet I feel like I’ve known them for 10 plus years,” UCLA freshman Alexandria Masinde said.
However, beyond having fun, friendship can also aid your self discovery during formative times such as college. According to a 2010 study by Ana M. Martínez Alemán about college women’s friendships, friendships with other women are “a site for assessing meaning of self and of reality, a site for the experience of different perspectives and viewpoints, and an opportunity for growth through interdependency.” Through the friendships you acquire during college, you expose yourself to diverse perspectives and personalities, and the experiences you have with them are an avenue to grow and develop into the person you’re meant to be.
Additionally, surrounding yourself with good friends can be beneficial for your health, both physically and mentally. The Journal of Clinical Oncology published a study stating that women with early-stage breast cancer were four times more likely to die from cancer if they didn’t have many friends. However, those with larger groups of friends had a much better survival rate.
The reasons why friendships, particularly for women, have such positive effects on health is because of the emotional support friends can provide. Research by UCLA states, “women more reliably turn to their social contacts in times of stress, responses that are . . . protective of health and longevity.” Therefore, because women have their friends to comfort them, they are able to preserve their health much better than they would if they only had themselves to rely on.
However, remember that quality is over quantity; you don’t need a group of a hundred friends to live a healthy and fulfilling life.
A friend of mine, Chastity Salazar, shared her own experience which shows that having just one good friend you can rely on makes all the difference. She said, “My cousin and I are truly the best of friends and the bond we share is one of the most beautiful things I’ve experienced.”
She continues by sharing a story where her cousin supported her during her first real heartbreak, when others couldn’t. “Everyone knew I was sad of course, but my cousin knew there was something much deeper going on. Through my depression she was a constant reminder of love… having her around allowed me to grow above, rediscover love, and be the person I am now.”
Her experience with her cousin is a wonderful example of how friends can be a safe space to express your feelings and overcome difficult challenges. Having just one person to rely on as you experience the hardships of college life is one of the most important factors of ensuring your emotional and academic success.
Speaking of success, women with a good circle of friends are proven to be more successful. According to the Harvard Business Review, the women who had “female-dominated inner circles” were more likely to get executive positions with higher pay. Once again, this is because these women can rely on each other and discuss issues such as implicit bias and sexism in the workplace.
One major example of how female friendship leads to success is Susan B. Anthony and Elizabeth Candy Stanton’s relationship. Both women formed a deep bond during the 19th century, and, throughout their relationship, they inspired each other and were instrumental pioneers for the fight for women’s rights.
By coming together, women can fight to combat the gender discrimination they experience in school and work. Additionally, having good friends around you can help motivate you as you achieve your academic and career goals.
Another friend of mine, Priya Venkatesan, once told me, “The special thing about female friendship is that it’s all about lifting each other up,” and when it comes to college, especially ones that are more male dominated, having women you can turn to and who will uplift you is essential.
But where can we find such amazing friends? College is an amazing place to gain new friendships, but sometimes it’s hard to know where to start. Well, one of the first friendships people make in college are the friendships they make with their roommates.
So, I decided to ask one of my roommates, Luna Escobar, their thoughts on making friends in college. She said, “Female friendship is genuinely just finding someone you can be a girl’s girl with.”
She believes finding commonalities with people and bonding over said commonalities is one of the easiest ways to become friends. That’s why going to clubs or organizations that are catered to your interests is a great way to meet new people. Those who also attend are bound to share similar interests as you, and you therefore can create friendships through that.
Another way to make friends is to reach out to classmates. Talking to the people you see regularly in class is a quick way to meet new people, and, especially with harder subjects, reaching out to classmates with questions on assignments can be a conversation starter, and an invitation for potential study sessions or groups down the line.
Additionally, getting to know the people in your dorm is a great way to make new friends. These are the people you’ll live with for the school year, so creating strong connections with them can be very beneficial.
Lastly, it’s important to just be open and approachable. Not every person you meet will be your new best friend forever, but they might be! It’s as simple as complimenting someone’s outfit or hair. Just being open to new people is the easiest way to find and create friendships that will make your college experience one of the best times of your life.