7 Tips For How To Deal With A Friend Breakup

So we all remember ….the infamous Tristan Thompson-Jordyn Woods scandal. If you don’t know the details … basically Tristan Thompson, Khloe Kardashian’s baby daddy, was at a party with Jordyn Woods, Kylie Jenners then childhood best friend. It was reported that the two were very flirtatious and was speculated that this led to something more. This incident was all over the media and Kylie Jenner cut her relationship with Jordyn Woods.

Kylie Jenner had her friendship breakup blasted all over the media. We have all gone through friend breakups; the only difference is that it doesn’t end up on the front cover of TMZ. Let’s be honest… best friend breakups suck. But sometimes they need to happen and don’t always occur out of bad blood. Sometimes it’s just distance or there’s that loss of that friendship spark. You both simply grew up and changed and can’t offer each other learning experiences. And this is totally okay.

But sometimes they are nasty …. Which really really sucks (speaking from experience). So here are some tips and words of advice to keep yourself going and reassuring yourself you are making the right choice:

1- You DON’T need anyone else. At the end of the day you are your own person and over dependency is not healthy in any relationship. It hurts to not have that person as part of your routine but it’ll heal with time… trust. Me holding my friend David's hand Kait D'Souza 2- You DON’T owe anyone anything. Friendships shouldn’t hold pressure on certain expectations or hold things over your head. Sometimes people’s expectations of who they want us to feel impossible and end in feeling not “good enough”. You shouldn’t have to walk on eggshells in a friendship. 

3- Communication is key in any relationship but passive-aggressive comments and one-sided conversations don’t count as that. Passive-aggressive comments can make anyone feel crappy and if anyone continues to communicate in that way because it’s “how they are” then this isn’t a healthy relationship. It’s also not fair to have arguments that are totally one-sided because you don’t have the opportunity to defend yourself. How you communicate is important.

4- Space is reasonable. I once heard in a relationship 1+1 does not equal 2 but equals 3. You both are separate individuals creating this friendship and it’s reasonable to need your own space and have separate friends. It’s also totally reasonable to ask for space to evaluate the friendship. 

5- You deserve respect. As friends, we know we joke around and make fun of each other. I know my friends constantly make fun of my inability to see because I refuse to wear my glasses (I’m sorry to my eye doctor.. Maybe one day I’ll listen) But these jokes shouldn’t make you feel incompetent or less than. You gotta remind yourself that you are a BOSS A*#  B!!!

6- Friendships are to build and not to hurt. One of the things that hurt me the most in my friend breakup was recalling one of our arguments in which my friend said, “I just want to hurt you like you hurt me”. And I’m truly sorry I hurt her and it wasn’t my intention. I realized at that moment that this wasn’t a healthy friendship if the mentality was an eye for an eye. Tissues and glasses Photo by Kelly Sikkema on Unsplash 7- On a more serious note… you are not being dramatic. If you are not happy in this friendship, that’s enough of a reason. 

I’m here with you and you are not going through this alone. Even Kylie billionaire Jenner (please tell me you get this reference) went through it all over the media. Friend breakups are a normal part of life and how you deal with them is the important part. They suck and hurt and can even make you doubt yourself. But at the end of the day, if this relationship is hurting you, you have to do it—you owe it to yourself. 

P.S. Cookie dough ice cream helps too! :)