1. Go watch Master of None, Season 1 – Episode 5 (Nashville).
It’s on Netflix. Don’t read the rest of this article until then, because it’s just not going to be funny.
Optional: Watch entire first season of Master of None to prove you have a good sense of humor. Plus, then you can add it as a skill to your LinkedIn.
2. Find someone for your IRL Nashville date.
Preferably someone you know, and not just a random on Tinder. If you’re a heterosexual dude and you don’t get why we’ve made that suggestion, go watch Season 1 – Episode 7 (Ladies ad Gentlemen). You can pick a romantic interest in your life to clown in Nash-town, or a person you think is cool and want to be (better) friends with.
3. Tell your chosen person to clear their sched.
They’re going on a Nashville date. Tips for icebreaker/invitation message: picture of a turtle coming out of a briefcase. If they don’t know what that is, they may not be suitable for your romancing or friendship needs because they clearly have not watched Master of None. Refer them to step one and make them watch all of Master on None. If you haven’t done it yet, we told not to read this article. Go watch Master Master of None and we’ll forgive you.
4. Plan Nashville date.
Obviously we live in Canada and actual Nashville is pretty far. The Canadian honky-tonk equivalent is Calgary, but that’s also pretty far, plus Canadian airlines suck, and it is winter there 90% of the time. You should probably just take the ferry to the island or drive somewhere neat. Alternatively, you can staycation here in Van City (or wherever you live).
5. Okay, now you have to do Nashville activities.
Go to Tickler’s and a Honky Tonk. JK, they don’t have those things in Vancouver. They have a lot of other things though, most of which you probably haven’t done. The best dates fit the Monster Truck Rally theory. If you don’t know what that is, go read Aziz Ansari’s book Modern Romance. It basically just means go do something ridiculous and cool that’s out of your comfort zone. Even just people watching can be fun. We recommend alcohol, but it’s not necessary.
6. Do those activities with that person for at least a day, possibly longer.
As long as you can last without being an asshole. The whole point of this exercise is basically binge-watching, but instead of gaining of knowledge of how hilarious Aziz Ansari is in Season 1 of Master of None and sitting on your couch eating popcorn for ten hours, you’re developing a greater relationship with your date. You just get all the butterflies out of the way and get to know someone better than you would on a superficial date or hangout.
7. You know the Nashville date is successful if you want to spend time with that person again, but not right now.
We’re not trying to Amazing Race your relationship. If you don’t get that reference, watch all 16 Seasons of Amazing Race. No, but seriously Nashville dates are a great way to get to know someone, and also Aziz Ansari is a genius who is in no way affiliated with this article (but we wish he was)
This article was paid for by the Aziz Ansari Fan Club for Aziz Ansari for the promotion of Aziz Ansari humor, in partnership with the late Harris Wittels and Alan Yang, who are by no means an afterthought but just aren’t as cute as Aziz Ansari