Most of us have been there: your current romantic endeavour is no longer as fun or lustful as it once was. You’ve tried to talk out your issues, but things just seem to be falling apart. In the end, one of you (or maybe both) decides it’s best that you go your separate ways. It’s a tough spot to be in.
However, breakups can be a great learning experience (take it from me). Oddly enough, they’re a fantastic time to choose to prioritize yourself and your happiness and be grateful for the support you have. It’s important to choose yourself instead of running back to what once was, so here are my top five ways to choose yourself after a breakup.
- recognize and accept how you feel
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Whether it’s sadness, anger, relief, or all three, a first step to taking care of yourself post-breakup is to realize that however you feel, it’s okay. It’s also important to realize that these feelings are only for a brief moment in time, and as life goes on, moving on will get easier.
- Remind yourself of your strengths
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Regardless of how the breakup went down, it’s important to remember that you’re that girl! You’re amazing, beautiful, strong, and talented. Take some time to write down a few “I am” statements and remind yourself that despite this drawback, you’re still a great person with great qualities.
- Accept that You’re not perfect (that’s ok!)
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On the flip side, maybe you feel guilt or regret about how things ended. It’s important to realize that you’re not perfect and may have (or definitely have) made mistakes that led to the end of your relationship. Learning to be at peace with yourself, despite your mistakes, and taking lessons from them will help you choose to prioritize your happiness and personal growth post-breakup.
- Look around you!
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After a breakup, the world may feel pretty lonely. After all, you probably spent a considerable amount of time with this person. But I encourage you to take a look around you. You may not realize it at first, but I guarantee that you have friends and/or family waiting there to support you through this tough time. Choosing yourself is not only about protecting your peace, but is also about allowing those you trust to be there for you and help you as best they can during this difficult time.
- Take as much time as you need
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Breakups aren’t easy and everyone has different barriers and facilitators in their life that shape how the breakup process will go. Try to choose yourself by recognizing that this post-breakup journey is your own path and that it’s ok to take your time. Whether you move on in a month or take a year, that’s ok. Everyone’s situation is different!
While breakups aren’t easy, hopefully, this read on choosing yourself can help you to recognize that in the end, you’ll be okay!