If you want to shop and thus, be a customer, there should be guidelines and a pamphlet that reference all of the questions in this article, enabling you to do so properly; also to save the retailers from going ballistic. Who wouldn’t sign a petition for that movement, am I right?
I hope this article is informative and makes you think twice before asking something to a poor and innocent sales clerk who’s just working there to be able to ball on a budget during their school year. Have you ever worked retail? If you have, my heart is with you. If you haven’t, I hope in reading this you can at least begin your journey to becoming a less awful customer in life.
Disclaimer: I, as a retail sales employee, have been asked all of these questions whilst at my job. I really can’t make this stuff up.
“Do you work here?”
This may just be a customer being polite but I’m wearing a uniform, and I’m wearing a nametag and I’m standing behind the counter ringing through another customer’s purchase…I believe in your super sleuth abilities to detect my purpose in this store.
“Do you have any t-shirts?”
Did you look around the store yet? No, really, did you look around the store, yet? I saw you come through the front door, walk up to me and ask me this. I don’t – what do you mean – there’s twenty types of t-shirts – I can’t – they’re everywhere! Open your eyes! Why do I have to shop for you?
“Can I get American money back?”
This line is strictly from the type 1 worst customers ever: tourists. Okay, so you’re in Canada; did you remember that when you’re asking me to give you change in foreign currency? We have Canadian currency in store cash registers, in our banks and in our wallets. You drove here, flew here, or sailed here, no matter the way you got here, you’re here, and I have enough confidence in saying that you were aware of the fact that in Canada we use Canadian dollars.
“Do you have anything not made in China?”
Girl, do not come waltzing up to me feeling superior to items made in China whilst on your iPhone made in China. Do expect me to give you a full-fledged run down of every item in this entire store. I’ll do it. Don’t think I won’t. Don’t test me. I have student loan debt. I have commission to fulfill. I’m liable to do anything.
“Why is everything so expensive?”
Probably because they have to pay me enough to answer questions like this politely (or probably because I’m currently showing you everything not made in China). Things in stores cost money. I know you know that. You may be new to this store in particular and are appalled at our prices but please do not ask me why, I do not price the merchandise. I’m barely trying to sell it to you at this point.
“I’m buying this for someone about your size, could you help me?”
I’m ready to be offended when I’m told that the recipient of this garment is “about my size.” Please do not ask for my help and then when I tell you my size think I’m completely out to get you or ruin a thoughtful gift by purposely making you buy the wrong size. I don’t want you to buy the wrong size because then you’d need to come back and return it and I’d still be here, wearing the same size that I told you. Help me; help you.
“Could I have a discount (for absolutely no other reason besides the fact that I don’t want to pay full price)?”
The item you’re buying is 100% undamaged, you came shopping knowing things aren’t free, you’re looking at my broke student face, and you have the audacity to ask me for a discount? My polite response is always “I don’t own the store, so I can’t do that for you” and their blunt bargaining hunting heart, against probably all common sense, asks to speak to the owner or manager. Bro.
“Can I play in dollars?”
Yes. I do accept dollars.
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