It’s almost the end of the term, and that hottie you’ve been seeing has been keeping you warm through the cold weather. You’ve fallen into the FWB (friends-with-benefits) zone, an easy place to slip into, but a not-so-easy place from which to escape. Recently, a realization has set in that you may have deeper feelings for your leading man. Is it too late to break out of the hook-up zone and into a serious relationship? Our campus cutie gives us a guy’s perspective on the issue.
Major: International Studies
Interests: Watching sports, playing tennis and basketball, music
Favorite Quote: “Give me liberty or give me death.”
Relationship Status: Single
Turn-Ons: sincere, enthusiastic, unique personality, optimistic
Turn-Offs: Egocentric, selfish, close-minded, pessimistic
Once you’ve loosely established a “no-more-than-hook-up” relationship, is it difficult for a girl to break out of this zone?
I’ve never been involved in a relationship that’s purely physical; my relationships usually involve feelings, but I would imagine that it would be difficult for a girl to break out of this zone.
Do you prefer casual hook-ups to dating or serious relationships?
I definitely prefer serious relationships.
What signals can a girl send you to get the message across that she wants more than just a physical relationship?
When she starts asking me questions about my life, beyond just a casual introduction.
What things should girl not resort to as a last minute attempt to get the guy’s attention? What are things that make a girl seem desperate?
If a girl just tries too hard, maybe they change their physical appearance just to impress a guy – kind of like in Mean Girls, where the girl completely changes her appearance. I mean that would be nice, but she shouldn’t have to completely change herself to get a guy’s attention. Also, if anything gets too excessive in phone calls, texts, talking– grabbing my arm, leg, etc. it’s too much.
Is it possible to have a purely friends-with-benefits relationship?
No. I honestly don’t think so because some types of feelings will be revealed eventually, regardless of whether one individual doesn’t want to be with another or if one person cares more about the other person. It’s hard to maintain just pure physicality.
His advice: Don’t get into a friends-with-benefits relationship with the expectation that he’s not going to have feelings or grow feelings for you; guys have this image that they can be unfeeling or whatever, but guys are sensitive as well.
This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at U Mich chapter.