We’ve all been there. Your friend is telling a story and they can’t help but explain Every. Single. Detail. You’re trying your hardest to listen but it just keeps getting longer and you just keep getting hungrier. You have places to go and people to see but this story is taking no pity on you. These are the stages of listening to a long story as told by Mindy Kaling.
Stage 1You think the story might actually be a good story. You’re eager to hear it.
Stage 2You start to realize the story is not as great as you thought. In fact, it’s kind of lagging, but you decide to be polite and stay. If only you weren’t so hungry.
Stage 3“Okay, does this story have a point,” you wonder, almost out loud.
Stage 4It’s starting to feel like agreeing to hear this story meant giving up the rest of your natural born life.
Stage 5You suppose it’s far too late to back out now but secretly make a pact with yourself to never listen to this person’s stories ever again.
Stage 6The daydreaming kicks in.
Stage 7
You think it’s over. But it turns out the story teller was simply taking a long breath.
Stage 8FINALLY, the story concludes coming to a dull, drawn out, anti-climatic ending. But you don’t care because you’re just happy it’s over. That’s the last time you let an opening line about a puppy suck you in.