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Wellness > Mental Health

Friendship Standards: 5 Values That Keep Me and My Bestie’s Friendship Strong

This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at U Mass Amherst chapter.

We all know that having standards in our romantic relationships is a MUST, but have you ever considered that having standards in your platonic relationships is just as important? From the inevitable, awkward middle school phase to graduating high school and going off to college, my best friend and I have been there for each other through thick and thin. Aside from our many similarities, my bestie and I believe that what has kept our bond so strong throughout all these years are the values in which we have incorporated into our friendship. So, in honor of my amazing best friend, here are five values that I believe help to create and sustain fulfilling and life-long friendships!

Trust

Although accidental, hurting one’s feelings is oftentimes inevitable in friendships. When someone makes a poorly-landed joke, or oversteps a boundary, running to the nearest person to gossip can be tempting. Even though a good rant-sesh can be relieving in the short term, I have found that talking behind a friend’s back depletes a friendship of trust and honesty.

My best friend and I have created a strong bond of trust within our friendship through open and honest communication. When my bestie and I run into an issue, we can trust one another to communicate the problem without speaking poorly of each other to others.

We also build trust with each other by being pro secret keepers! Whatever secret my bestie wants to share is safe with me, and vice-versa.

Acceptance

I truly believe that one should feel comfortable enough to be their truest, most vulnerable, weirdest self around their friends without receiving any judgement. A good friend makes you feel loved, and you cannot truly feel loved without the acceptance of your realest self. I truly feel at home when I am with my best friend because I know that despite both of our flaws and quirks, we still will be there for each other no matter what!

Respect

In our friendship, my bestie and I always make sure to respect each other’s boundaries and differences. Respect in our friendship looks something like respecting each other’s space, respecting each other’s opinions, and refraining from insulting one another or making joke’s at the other’s expense.

Reciprocation

There’s no worse feeling than feeling like you are the one who puts all of the effort into your relationships. My best friend and I make sure to show each other an equal exchange of care to show that we support and appreciate one another. Your friends should be filling up your cup not draining it!

Genuine Support

Last but not least, genuine support is a value that keeps my best friend and I’s friendship strong! Us girls are often conditioned to compete with one another, leading to jealousy in our friendships. However, my bestie and I make sure to always have each other’s best interest in mind by celebrating each other’s highs and being there for one another during our lows. A win for my bestie is a win for me!

Conclusion

Sure, no one is perfect and conflict will inevitably rise in almost all of your relationships. However, it is important to be thoughtful of how you approach the conflicts that you face within your friendships. Reciprocal respect and kindness in your friendships is the first step to making lifelong besties!

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Kyla Davis

U Mass Amherst '27

Kyla Davis is a Freshman at UMass Amherst majoring in Journalism with a Public Relations concentration.