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Best New YouTube Craze: Honest Trailers

I think we’ve all geared up for a night out with friends, a new hyped-up movie release, and an extra-large carton of Dibs (highly recommend, they’re actually pure deliciousness), only to find that the acting’s a disaster, or that the ending left you like:

Sometimes the entire movie is just so awful that you briefly consider rioting against the theater to get your $12 back.

Screen Junkies’ “Honest Trailers” say out loud all of the things we really think while watching these popular flicks, the kinds of things you’ll never hear in a critic’s review. From the movies we love, to the ones we love to hate, these spins on the flicks we’ve all come to know will have you clutching your sides and admitting to yourself:

Here are a few of their best ones:

1. The Hunger Games: Catching Fire

I know, I know. I love a good Hunger Games film as much as anyone, but you gotta admit, this trailer is just too on-point and too entertaining not to include.

Quote: Experience a film that’s ultimately just a commercial for the next film.

2. Man of Steel

Though I was really disappointed with this flick in theaters, I can’t even lie, I still watched it online because Henry Cavill is actually physical perfection… Don’t judge me.

Quote: He’s the hero who stood for truth, justice, and the American way, but this time stands for destroying American property.

3. After Earth

I actually didn’t mind this movie (I’m a big Will Smith fan so maybe I’m a little biased), but I couldn’t argue with this trailer. There are also some pretty hilarious one-liners mixed in there about the Smith family.

Quote: … disaster strikes as they crash on a terrifying version of “After Earth”: full of non-threats like monkeys, eagles, whales, bugs, snakes, foliage, and the cold. 

4. The Dark Knight

I’m a huge fan of the newest Batman trilogy, especially this movie (I actually sobbed when the late Heath Ledger won the Oscar for Best Supporting Actor for this film… I’ll admit it, no shame), but the quips in this trailer are some of my favorites.

Quote: The Joker will test Batman like never before when he places two hostages at two different locations, which for some reason means that Batman, nor… the Gotham City Police Department, can reach them both at the same time.

5. Titanic

Whether you were a fan of the movie or not, I think every person who’s ever seen Titanic has wondered: Why the hell did Jack have to die? 

That door looked pretty big, Rose… And you’re a pretty small woman… We saw you naked, be real here. I think it’s safe to say you both could have fit.

Quote: Jack is an unrealistically sexy peasant, and Rose is a first-class, suicidal pair of boobs.


6. Paranormal Activity

Paranormal Activity has gotten pretty mixed feedback, but it’s been successful enough to spawn three more editions to the series. Honestly, I couldn’t tell you why.

Quote: Brace yourself for 86 minutes of a guitar, a door, a fridge, some empty rooms, a ceiling grate, a chandelier, some blinds, an attic door, stairs, stairs, stairs, stairs, Juliet from Lost(?), and stairs.

7. The Amazing Spider-Man

Personally, I was a lover of the Tobey Maguire Spider-Man movies, and I thought it was kind of soon to already be trying to reboot the series, but it seems like it’s been pretty well-received.

Whichever side you fall of the Maguire vs Garfield debate, you probably agree with at least one of the quips mentioned in the trailer. And if not, you’re pretty likely to get a good laugh out of it.

Quote: Peter Parker was just an attractive, intelligent, likeable, athletic, well-dressed teenage loser, but when he easily walks into a high-security lab, one radioactive spider bite will give Peter the ability to… break everything, get every father-figure in his life murdered… and stutter worse than Shia LaBeouf in “Transformers.”

8. Twilight

You probably guessed the Twilight series was going to be on this list. There was no avoiding it. It was too easy a target.

Not to say that most of us didn’t go pay to see them in theaters…

A part of you probably even thinks they’re ridiculous, but a stronger part can’t help yourself. Collegiettes, I get it. The struggle over “Twilight” is real for us all.

Quote: …a film that teaches young girls that the only thing that matters is finding a man, a hundred year old man. But don’t worry, it’s not pedophilia because he looks seventeen.

You can check out these links to the Honest Trailers of the Twilight sequels below (both equally hysterical):

Twilight: New Moon

Twilight: Eclipse

9. Les Miserables

Gotta say, I love me some Les Miserables (also cried when Anne Hathaway won the Oscar for Best Supporting Actress for this film… but I promise those were the only two times I cried over the Oscars). But even I had to admit some of these side-jokes couldn’t be any more true. 

Quote: … told in award-winning songs of beauty and exuberance… except those sung by Russell Crowe.

Honestly, who even hired him? Who allowed that to happen?

10. Harry Potter

My love for the Harry Potter franchise is a little unsettling. Someone should honestly have a support group for Harry Potter addicts. (Did I just make a thing?)

But the names at the end of this trailer are too good, and even the most die-hard fan has to admit that the films weren’t entirely perfect… though pretty dang close.

Look out for more Honest Trailers on the Screen Junkies’ YouTube channel, and leave us your comments with the movies you want to see them cover in upcoming trailers! Happy binge-watching, ladies!

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Danielle Rivera

U Mass Amherst

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