My Experience in a Long Distance Relationship

“I met the right person, just at the wrong time,” a phrase many of us have related to or at least thought about. In fact, I can assure you that there is no wrong time when meeting the right one, it is in fact true that the right person is timeless. They make time spent together as joyful as summer days and turn them into memorable summer nights. Many have found their summer love fade away into the crisp Autumn season, leaving them hopeless of ever being in a successful long-distance relationship. I am here to attest that a long-distance relationship is not only common, especially among college students like myself, but is also something that is as successful as the work you and your partner both put into it. I’m here to share my story of my partner Conor and I as well as how we stay connected living eight hours away.

I was born and spent the majority of my life in New Jersey, in fact making me a “Jersey girl who always toughens up.” I have been through a few relationships; my first love throughout my years in middle school and high school, my first long-distance relationship, and then another. As you can see, I was skeptical myself of a successful long-distance relationship. With the growth in technology and heavy reliance on our phones, we are able to meet people with the touch of our fingertips. Social media platforms and online dating apps make technology an easy way to communicate to one another and in a sense search the internet for a significant other.

Tinder is a common dating app that many college students use or have used. The common consensus for this app is mostly a “hookup site,” where it is rare to find someone who is looking for a commitment. After using Tinder for some time, I found that there would be nothing substantial that would come out of using this app for me personally. Before I decided to delete the app, Conor had messaged me, which is where we exchanged phone numbers. I was immediately caught off guard when he had asked to facetime me instead of talking to me, especially since texting is a common form of communication. For me, I prefer as much person-to-person interaction, to make my connections with all my relationships stronger. We had talked for hours on facetime, yet it felt as if it was barely one. This is when I knew that we had clicked immediately, especially with so much in common. I didn’t know that Tinder would actually bring about my current long-distance boyfriend.

After meeting up for the first time, I felt an even stronger connection, something I hadn't felt in quite some time. I felt as though I could immediately be myself around him, as if I had known him forever, and was my best friend except whom I may have liked a little more than that. Everything seemed “too good to be true” with the exception of a long-distance relationship. With Conor living in New Jersey and me attending The University of Maine, I felt as though I would “embrace this while it would last.” Despite the strong connection we immediately felt, I found myself worried about a potential successful relationship. We had spent as much time as possible together before I would return for my spring semester. As the approach to my spring semester crept upon me, I was left feeling more melancholy at the thought of actually being away from him and how successful we would be together.

I am still relatively at the beginning of my semester, although I am confident that our current plan will continue to be successful. I am not going to lie to you, being in a long-distance relationship is not always easy, although it depends on the effort and time that you and your partner exchange with one another. Although Conor and I have different schedules we still find some time to contact one another. Communication is the most crucial aspect in any relationship, especially a long-distance one. Don’t get me wrong, we have had our disagreements but I totally expected that.  When you have not seen your significant partner in quite some time, it is difficult to understand what is going on in their lives, where you are only able to experience them through technology. It is crucial to talk to your partner about any concerns that arise and talk them through with one another. All relationships have moments of jealousy and insecurity; therefore, it is essential that you are open and honest when talking about your feelings instead of being insecure; trust your partner. Reassurance is always helpful in resolving any negative thoughts. When you go a long time without seeing your partner, you build up the perfect reunion or scenario in your head. It is best to not expect the most amazing things to happen at specific times, it usually only leads to disappointment, and the best moments come naturally in time.

Being in a long-distance relationship also has its advantages. I was surprised as I found myself wanting to achieve a lot more since I am not able to see Conor each day. Living your individual lives and building personal success is essential just as much as growth and success within your relationship. You are able to learn different things about your partner that may not come from being right next to them. Being states away from Conor has made me realize all the things I love about him that exist outside of any physical ways. Appreciation of another person beyond a physical level is something that resonates further in your relationship between you and your partner. Building, growing, and learning together is something that will always happen in every relationship. The beauty of a long-distance relationship is that you are able to always find more reasons than you may realize of as to why this person is your significant other. Each time I talk to Conor, I continue strive in reaching all my aspirations and work towards being right next to him. I know he is worth it, and he knows that I am worth it, so we do continue to do what it takes to stay together. In a sense, this has connected us more than anything