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From A Guy’s Perspective: Home for the Holidays


       Finally, you’re back home. The hellish last week of the semester is over after 5 finals, numerous group projects, a ridiculous weekend of work, and a terrible hangover to celebrate the end of it all. You’ve been so caught up with school lately that all romantics have been on the back burner.  You’re out with all your best friends from home that you haven’t seen in months. The group of guys you used to hang out with are back home too. They walk into the bar or house – wherever – and everyone stops and starts dishing out the traditional hugs and handshakes. Then he walks in.

       You haven’t talked since summer, high school, a college visit, etc., and he looks good. Really good. Not sure what to do, you go through your usual tactics. You sit and laugh with your friends while you actively ignore him, but at the same time, watch his every move. Or you give a quick “Hey how are you?!” and immediately become involved in an extremely long text message or some girl that’s in your chemistry class.

       It doesn’t matter if he’s an ex, old friend, or someone you met at school, here are a couple reasons why it’s a good idea to show some interest and rekindle the flames while your home for the holidays.

              People Change – Sometimes it’s not always for the better, but as you get older people tend to reprioritize and, generally, round off some of those sharper edges they may have previously had. So some of the guys that were pretty childish when you last talked could have grown up a bit. If you used to be together, maybe its time to make amends or start anew. Chances are he’s been thinking about you already and now that you’re home it’s inevitable. If it’s a friend that seems, for reasons unknown to yourself, to have gotten exponentially hotter since the last time you saw him, go see what’s new.

              Home Sweet Home – You’re not at school. You don’t have to stumble back to your apartment in the morning in broken heels, hang out in his dorm room, or worry about sneaking him in and out of your sorority house. Unless your other roommates (parents) have disowned you, hanging out at home with your guy is an ideal situation. Not only is there the possibility that your parents will be out doing holiday errands quite a bit so you’ll have time to yourselves, but you’ll also be in an environment that you feel comfortable in. Hanging out at home allows both of you to drop your guards and get close. For me, it’s also a sign that the girl really is interested in me rather than just entertaining the idea of me. Ask him if he wants to watch a movie one of the nights or loaf around the house with you during the day.

              Tis the Season – People are happier around Christmas. Fact. You’ll both be in high spirits and this really does foster a better romantic atmosphere. Why do you think Harry Potter and Cho Chang get all PG-13 for the first time underneath the mistletoe? Of course, you’ll be spending a lot of time with your family, but there’s plenty of opportunity for you both to enjoy the seasonal festivities. You can go ice skating (awesome), sledding (whiskey optional), or sit around and eat all the left over food together (epic). Plus, it’s not like you’re home for the weekend. You likely have a solid month or 3 weeks to hang out together and get closer to one another. Think of it as a small summer fling in the middle of December and don’t be afraid to get close.  

       Personally, this HP fan finds it a relief to come home away from all the superficial romantics and dramatics that come with being at school. When I come home, reconnecting with some of my girlfriends is what I look forward to the most. It’s more real. And coming from a guy whose had more “flings” than he can count that’s saying something.

       Who knows, it could turn out to be much more and you guys will keep in touch when you go back to school or visit each other. At the very least, you’ll both have someone to occupy you emotionally and physically over the break. The main thing is to keep it light and easy going. There’s no need to up the stakes right away and give him the relationship ultimatum. Let it culminate and I’m sure you’ll find out why this is truly the most wonderful time of the year. 

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