Matthew Perry recently held an interview with Diane Sawyer to discuss his new book, Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing. The story was heart wrenching, but truly inspiring. Matthew Perry was one of the stars of the hit sitcom Friends which aired in the late 90’s to the early 2000’s. Perry’s wish of becoming famous came true when he moved to Los Angeles to live with his father, John Bennett Perry. He starred in a play, then was quickly discovered and landed his first gig on television, including making an appearance on the hit show Beverly Hills 90210. Soon after, he auditioned for Friends and landed the part. Producers based his character “Chandler” on his actual awkward and anxious personality. His issues with addiction began with drinking, and it took him 6,000 Alcoholics Anonymous meetings, over 15 rehab visits, 30 years of therapy, half of his life in treatment, and an attempt at 65 detoxes until he was able to fully get clean.
Read on for a summary of Matthew Perry’s story, shared in his memoir and the Diane Sawyer interview.
The drinking
From a young age, Matthew said he always felt lonely. HIs parents split when he was just one year old, and they both remarried and started new families soon after. He said there were always many unanswerable questions, which he needed answering. At the age of 14 years old, Matthew and some friends decided to drink. He drank an entire bottle of wine and he truly believed this was the answer to all of his questions and problems. Perry believed that the feeling of being drunk was completely normal. It curbed all of his fears and anxiety, as well as the loneliness.
By the time he was 18, Matthew would drink every day, and worse, he would drink alone. He always would hide his addiction because he made a rule for himself that he would never show up to work drunk, however, he would show up violently hungover, even to the point where he would be shaking. Other than that, there were no problems on set or with his acting. Perry says he knew this show would be the best time of his life, so therefore, he wanted to remember it, and he did not want to screw it up. He knew he could not tell his family because they would tell him to stop filming.
The transition to pills
Jennifer Aniston was the first to reach out to Matthew saying “We know you’ve been drinking. We smell it.” Although this was terrifying for him to hear, he was in no position to stop. Cast and crew kept reaching out to him, and he told them he was on medication and it would not happen again. Of course, this was not true.
In the year 1997, Matthew’s addiction turned from bad to worse when he became addicted to pills. He was on break on the set of Fools Rush In when he obtained an injury in a jet skiing accident and was prescribed pain medication. He described this newfound feeling as “warm honey entering his veins.” Matthew thought that if he took more pills, and different kinds of medications, it would curb his drinking and they could take over his problems with fear and anxiety. He went from taking 12 Vicodin a day, then attempted a cold turkey quit, which left him feeling awful.
Soon after, his tolerance was so high that he was taking 55 Vicodin a day, and in order to get this amount of pills, he would literally do anything— including steal. Matthew described to Diane that on Sundays, he would go to open houses, go in the bathroom, and raid the medicine cabinet, taking whatever the owners had. Eventually, he went on Methadone to fight off his Vicodin withdrawals, but he increased the dosage for everything else. He would drink a quart of vodka a day, and mix it with Xanax, among other drugs.
The Spiral
Matthew told a story to Diane of how one day, a doctor noticed an empty handle of vodka in his living room. The doctor looked at him, scared, and asked if he had drank the entire bottle himself. Matthew replied with “yes,” and proceeded to ask for an increased dosage of Valium. This encounter caused the doctor to quite literally run out on Matthew.
Things were so bad during his career, that while on the set of Serving Sara, Perry was so incoherent that he was slurring all of his speech and messed up his lines so bad that he needed to go back and dub in his lines when he was sober. At one point, his girlfriend at the time said to him, “I think you’re disappearing,” and that was all he needed to check himself into rehab. However, his detox was awful, and after this, his addiction had been made public.
Perry was able to stay sober for a while, he would be driven from a treatment center right to the set of Friends, and even once the show ended, he was able to stay sober for a while. However, he stopped attending his meetings and talking to the people he needed to in order to stay clean— he believed he was able to stay sober on his own. Suddenly, around 2011, he relapsed and started taking pills again. In 2018, Matthew was hospitalized over intense stomach pains; his colon exploded while in the emergency room. He was then put on life support, an ECMO machine to be exact, and given a 2% chance to make it through the night. Out of the five people in the hospital on ECMO that night, Matthew was the only one to survive. He was in a coma for the next 14 days.
The recovery
Since 2018, and even up until earlier this year, Matthew has underwent countless surgeries to get his health to what it should be. He even had dental surgery right before Friends: The Reunion, but knew he needed to show up, no matter how much pain he was in. He truly feels as though his life was spared for a reason, as many others who suffer from addiction unfortunately do not win the battle. Perry also says that saving other people helps save him each day. He told Diane that the days aren’t that hard anymore, he keeps fighting because he knows things will get better eventually. Matthew also recounts a time during one of his first visits to rehab when a counselor told him, “This is not your fault,” and he has remembered that ever since. He wants to find new ways to help whoever he can, and going on his book tour soon, he thinks will be a step in the right direction.
Matthew’s thoughts
Matthew says that he wrote this book in order to help others who are struggling with addiction as well. He knew people would definitely listen to him based on the fact that he was Chandler Bing on Friends. Although his scars still show, with his speech altered, and bodily wounds from the many surgeries, his humor still shines through, and he even admitted in his book that he was so grateful to be able to see the endless beauty of the world around him. He admits also, in the first line of the book, that he should be dead. Perry says that he is living proof that addiction could hit anyone, even those with a somewhat-normal childhood.
Matthew discussed many times throughout his interview with Diane how grateful he was for the five other costars of the sitcom. In his book, he said they “propped him up until he was better.” When Diane showed scenes of his from when he was unhealthily skinny, you could tell how hard it was for him to watch. Matthew said “I feel sorry for that guy. He’s going through a lot.” Anyone can tell the difference in his weight throughout the entire Friends series. Matthew wants everyone to know how far he has come in the fight for recovery. He has broken so many bad relationship habits through therapy, and now he is not afraid to be himself— he knows that he does not keep a girl only by making her laugh! Overall, his message was simple, yet so powerful: never give up.
Although this is a very difficult topic to discuss or to even listen to a conversation on, he knows this book, and the interview is going to help people. He wants to be there for the people who are going through what he went through, and if anyone ever asked him for help, he would give it to them in a heartbeat. He wants everyone to keep fighting, as it will eventually be okay in the end, even if there are many ups and downs.
If you or someone you know is seeking help for substance use, call the SAMHSA National Helpline at 1-800-662-HELP(4357).