Whether you’ve seen it in pop culture, heard about it from friends, or experienced it yourself, we’ve all gathered some perceptions and misconceptions about sorority recruitment. Whether you associate it with grandiose houses filled with dozens of chanting girls, Bama Rush Tok’s Kylan Darnell, or trying to figure out what the hell a Rho Gammas is, one thing is for sure: you’ve probably heard some unsavory remarks about what “really” goes on. Lucky for those of you who find recruitment to be something of an enigma, I’m here to break down its ins and outs, provide a taste of what Greek life is really like, give advice, and help you decide if recruitment is right for you.
Recruitment Jargon
Before we get into the nitty-gritty, let’s test your recruitment vocab. Do you know what a PNM is? What about Pref? If you answered no to either of these questions then I’ve got you covered with this comprehensive list of jargon you will DEFINITELY hear during recruitment:
- Potential New Member (PNM): Anyone who is participating in Panhellenic recruitment.
- Rho Gamma: Those who will temporarily disaffiliate from their chapter to assist PNMs during recruitment.
- Pref (preference): The last and longest day of recruitment where members will share why they chose their sorority. You may even see some chapter ceremonies on this day.
- MRABA: The Membership Recruitment Acceptance Binding Agreement (MRABA) is a document that you must sign to accept a bid. If you receive a bid and choose not to stay in that chapter you cannot join another chapter until the next primary recruitment period.
- Mutual Selection: This is the process by which you choose and get chosen by a sorority. You will have to rank the sororities at the end of each day and they will also score you. These scores will determine how many houses and which houses you will return to.
- The 5 Bs: Boys, Bible, Booze, Bush (Politics), and Bucks (Money) will be the only five things that you should never talk about during recruitment
Common Misconceptions
Now that you’ve got your vocab down pat, let’s clear up some misconceptions that people commonly make about recruitment and Greek life in general.
Disclaimer: I cannot speak for every person at every Panhellenic chapter at every university. The following items come from my own experiences in Greek life at the University of Connecticut. From my perspective, UConn’s Greek life is not as extraneous as a Southeastern Conference (SEC) school.
- We pay for friends:
Don’t get me wrong, Greek life is notoriously pricey and I would be lying if I said otherwise. Coming from someone who pays their own dues, it can be difficult to pay that money, but it is a choice I will continue to make. I joined my sorority sophomore year of college and I already had an established friend group of unaffiliated friends. Our dues are dispersed into multiple areas including National Panhellenic fees, academic opportunities, events, apparel, workshops, and the list goes on.
- We’re superficial:
Once again, I cannot speak for every chapter, but based on my experience at UConn, I must say this idea could not be further from the truth. Please remember that if you ever feel like a chapter values the way you look over who you are, then that is not the right chapter for you. I am very proud to be a member of a sorority with a diverse group of members. During recruitment, we score based on character, not looks.
- We all haze:
I am very thankful to be part of a Panhellenic community that does not tolerate hazing in any form. Hazing can lead to injury or be life-threatening. If you are EVER forced or coerced into acts that make you feel uncomfortable or seem dangerous, do not be afraid to report the incident and drop the chapter. Prioritize your health and safety because it will always be more important than an organization. Sororities are meant to uplift their members, so please hold them to that standard. With that being said, it is unfortunate that some organizations still haze, but hazing is not a universal fact of being in a sorority. I hope anyone that knows me can testify to the fact that I would not be part of any group that undervalues its members and participates in hazing.
- We care about social life more than school:
Academics are a large part of any sorority’s enrichment. In fact, the majority of sororities will have some kind of Director or VP of Academics to ensure its members are successful in their academic endeavors. At my university, the entire first day of recruitment is dedicated to academics. Typically, the average Panhellenic GPA is higher than the average undergraduate GPA of the University. Sororities equip us with many academic resources including study hours, mentors, academic rewards systems, and networking opportunities.
- We are only friends with people in Greek life:
This will be different for everyone, but it is 100% possible to have friends outside of Greek Life. In fact, my best friends/roommates are unaffiliated and have never been a part of Greek life or even considered it. Being in a sorority can be a large time commitment, so naturally, you will make a lot of friends in your chapter, but I have never felt as though I did not have time for my unaffiliated friends.
How does recruitment work?
- Register: Go to your university’s panhellenic website to find the registration form. On that form, you will have to submit some basic information about yourself such as your major, hometown, hobbies, and GPA.
- PNM Orientation: This is when you will find out ALL of the information about how recruitment works at your university. This may also be the night you meet your Rho Gamma.
- Recruitment begins: At most universities, there are multiple days of recruitment, and they each touch on a different aspect of the sorority. At my university, we have four days of recruitment: scholarship, philanthropy, sisterhood, and preference. Each day, the conversations get longer and more personal. You will hear about each chapter’s academic initiatives, service events, sisterhood events (including Big/Little), and why members chose their sororities. By the last day, there will be tears. Each day after the rounds of recruitment you will be required to rank the sororities from favorite to least. They will also rank the PNMs. This mutual selection process will determine which houses you go back to the next day. Each day you will go back to fewer sororities than the day before. At my university, we go to all nine houses on the first day, max six houses on the second day, max of four houses on the third day, and two houses on the last day. On the last day, you will sign your MRABA.
- Bid Day: This is the day you can finally say you made it! You’re officially a new member of a sorority (you’re a new member until initiation and officially a member after initiation). On this day, all PNMs sit in a lecture hall or auditorium of some sort and open their bids together. You may receive a bid from either of the houses you saw on the last day of recruitment.
My advice
If you are considering going through formal recruitment, then you should! As someone who registered for formal recruitment the day before it began, I highly recommend just biting the bullet and seeing what happens. The best way to find out if Greek life is right for you is to try it, and if you don’t enjoy your PNM experience or don’t feel that any of the sororities are the right fit for you, there’s no shame in dropping the recruitment process. Trust your gut: if you don’t think Greek life is for you, then don’t force yourself to join.
Be open-minded. You might go into recruitment with preconceived ideas about each sorority. Let go of these notions. Going in with one sorority in mind is not the way to do it. If you do this, you may end up disappointed by that chapter. The best part of recruitment is getting to know the women in each chapter. Embrace every conversation by taking your time to get to know the members and make the most out of recruitment. At the end of the weekend, you will end up where you are meant to be.
Be kind to every chapter by making engaging conversations. For the PNM, having engaging conversations means asking lots of questions! I know for some this can be daunting, but if it’s any consolation, the recruiter is supposed to lead the conversation. Coming from someone who has been on both sides of recruitment, it’s just as nerve-racking to be the recruiter. With that being said, asking questions helps the recruiter keep conversation going and it makes you stand out to the chapter. You can ask questions about academics, philanthropy, sisterhood, and the recruiter’s experience in the chapter. You can also ask fun questions about their favorite foods, hobbies, books, if they like to travel, or did anything fun over break. Anything goes (except for the 5 B’s)! Just don’t put too much pressure on yourself. You’re bound to have an awkward conversation, but don’t worry, it happens to everyone at some point.
With Spring Recruitment on the horizon, I wish you all the best of luck! Just remember to have fun and the rest will fall into place.